Sleepyhead In Surrey

I might have been discovered by my sister. Erh...Kak Nona, if you are reading this, yes, it IS your little sister. Eheh.

Posted in: on January 27, 2005 at at 10:13:00 AM 0 comments

I am a princess.

Posted in: on January 26, 2005 at at 6:35:00 PM 0 comments

I created a different entry but I changed my mind. Ask Elixir.

Posted in: on January 19, 2005 at at 10:04:00 PM 0 comments

Is this an attempt at making an excuse for not cleaning your bedroom sound scientific? Hey, I'm in! At least for a day or two.

Posted in: on January 18, 2005 at at 5:10:00 PM 0 comments

Patutla semalam dia manja sangat dengan aku. Seronok hati aku tengok dia manja. Dia datang duduk dekat dengan aku. Kesian jugak tengok dia. She just lost her babies. When I first met her during Eidul Fitri I think she was just a few weeks pregnant. My sis kata teenage pregnancy. Yer lah. Muda sangat aku tengok dia tu. Badannya kecil genit. Abah kata macam Mak De aku yang tingginya tak sampai 5 kaki tu. Muka dia memang la comel. Agaknya sebab tu la cepat sangat mengandung.

Dia datang baring sebelah aku. Aku usap-usap kepala dia sampai dia tertidur. Kadang-kadang dia terjaga sambil meracau macam mengigau. Masa aku tengok dia macam tu aku rasa sebak. Mesti dia teringatkan anak-anak dia. Bila dia terjaga tu mesti dia pandang aku ibarat bertanyakan aku mana anak-anaknya. Aku tak tau nak jawab apa. Bukan salah aku dan pasti bukan salah dia. Abah dah usaha.

Aku masih tak puas ingat waktu aku duduk dengan dia tu. Pagi tadi aku bangun lambat. Selalunya aku terjaga sebab dengar suara Abah mengomel suruh dia makan. Dia ni pemilih sikit bab-bab makan ni. Itu tak mahu, ini tak nak. Makan ikut mood. Macam Kak Nona aku jugaklah. Sebab tu Kak Nona kurus agaknya. Tapi pagi tadi macam tak dengar pulak suara Abah berleter. Suara dia pun aku tak dengar. Aku bangun macam biasa. Bila keluar bilik tak rasa macam ada apa-apa yang kurang. Bila Joe telefon dan bertanyakan pasal dia pun aku jawab "Adalah tu, agaknya dekat luar". Lepas tu aku buat hal aku dalam bilik. Tak terasa pun nak bertanya khabar dekat dia. Takperlah, malam karang boleh jenguk dia; itulah kata hati aku.

Lepas maghrib aku keluar bilik. Nampak abah duduk berteleku depan tv. Suara dia macam serak. "Dik, pegi la makan sate. Mak ngan abah dan makan". Itu aje suruhan dia. Aku masuk dapur, ambil apa yang patut dan letak makanan depan tv. Aku teringat pulak nak alihkan mesin jahit dari bilik aku pegi ke bilik Kak Ida. Mak baru lepas sembahyang dalam bilik tu. Aku tak terduga mak nak tegur. "Dik, abah dah hantar Eid dengan Seb pegi pasar. Semalam dia gaduh dekat luar sampai abah tak boleh tidur...". Baru aku terpikir patutlah abah macam sedih. Macam orang hilang anak. Aku terduduk. Mula-mula aku rasa okey tapi lama-lama tak okey. Aku basuh pinggan kat dapur pun ternampak pinggan yang Eid selalu guna untuk makan. Dah elok terletak dekat tempat basuh pinggan. Selalu pinggan tu bukan dekat situ.

Aku tak tahan. Tak boleh tidur. Aku teringat kucing aku Eid. Sedih, trauma, risau. Agaknya apa lah dia makan kat Pasar Besar Kuantan tu? Memang la banyak ikan. Tapi boleh ke dia survive? Aku takut dia culture shock. Si Seb tu lagi sekor. Dah la lembut. Jantan tapi lembut. Badan dia tu dah berparut sebab asyik luka bergaduh. Aku tak sempat say goodbye pun dekat Eid. Eid yang baru kematian 3 ekor anak. Tak ada lagi la aku nak bukak pagar dengan ada 2 ekor kucing greet aku. Tak ada lagi aku nak gomol gomol badan comel si Eid tu dengan badan parut si Seb. Tak ada lagi la aku nak dengar abah aku berleter suruh Eid dengan Seb makan. Tak ada. Tak ada. Semua tak ada. Tolong! Aku tak tahan. Trauma!!!!

Posted in: on at at 5:14:00 AM 0 comments

Top 10 songs that Sleepyhead sings along to, to keep Sleepyhead from falling asleep while driving
(in no particular order)

1. Hey Ya - Outkast
Lagu Boyfriend Elixir

2. Crazy In Love - Beyonce Knowles
Lagu joget sexy

3. She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Lagu jiwang as suggested by Joe

4. Let's Get It Started - Black Eyed Peas
And runnin' runnin', And runnin' runnin', And runnin' runnin' (ulang 100x)

5. Welcome to My Life - Simple Plan
On the edge of breaking down, and noone's there to save you

6. Superstar - Jamelia

7. Dumb - 411
Diggy-diggy-di-dumb di-dumb

8. Nobody's Home - Avril Lavigne

9. These Words - Natasha Bedingfield
Lagu tema road trip Stoke-On-Trent and Loch Ness

10. Move Your Body - Nina Sky
Oye Mi Canto!

Posted in: on January 15, 2005 at at 2:31:00 PM 0 comments

It's still the same. That old guard house still standing in the same position with its occupants. Only this time one of them sports a bald head. The stairway to the above level had its rails painted in orange. The trees that lined the walkway have grown to become lush and green, creating some sort of a gateway to unforeseen haven. Out in the clearing, you could hear the flow of the water making its full circle from the source out into the pool and back again to be reprocessed. Only after you took the short flight of stairs will you actually see the pool. This was once where I spent my lonely evenings, pretending to be a small child again, remembering the day my abah plonked me in the muddy waters of rural KT. When the other occupants of 3D-04-09 were busy at their place of work or making their way home or buying dinner, I was alone there, or sometimes accompanied by a few slitted-eyes persons.

The stairs to the apartment block was also still the same. Only this time it had the distinct smell of cat poo or pee, I can't distinguish which, maybe both. I see a few more cats littering about underneath the many cars. The balcony had the same clothesline. The kitchen still houses the cute fridge courtesy of izzie, now married and awaiting the arrival of a baby. It had a bit more instant noodles, I noticed, probably because its current occupants are too busy to cook. But I do hear stories of a certain occupant who went on a diet and was intent on cooking vegetable soup every night for dinner.

This was once where I belonged. The place where I begun my journey of an adult life, earning a living and paying bills. Where I laid my head to sleep at night before continuing my life's routine the next day. I meet its current occupants and although I have known them for like a lifetime I still feel a bit shy at times, not knowing how to start a conversation with them. I wish I could be more friendly, or even more uninhibited. That will probably come soon.

It seemed unfamiliar at first but it's all coming back to me now.

Posted in: on January 11, 2005 at at 6:09:00 PM 0 comments

[1] I watched Jalan-Jalan Cari Makan on TV3 and its compere, Maria Tunku Sabri expressed her fondness of crabs (not the STD!). I myself cannot go to a seafood place without tasting the tiniest pinch of crab meat. A new haunt I discovered - a steamboat restaurant near KLCC called Seafood Terminal. An all you can eat buffet costs RM 38.00 and the selections include all the seafood you can eat(with or without marinade), steamed rice, chee cheong fun, and desserts. The marinade for the seafood is spicy and yummy. You can have a choice of chicken soup or tomyam.

[2] Having been bombarded with questions and lectures with regards to this by my parents, I have partially unintentionally let out my anger on Joe. We are currently separated (ahem! like brad pitt and jen aniston). I'm sure sooner or later we'll get back together (more like sooner rather than later). This always happens when I am under stress.

[3] I have never known myself to mouth bad or dirty words. Seems I did not know myself or my limits until yesterday when I uttered the word B-A-B-I. I slept dreaming of becoming one of those fat, furry swines I saw in The Farm on Five TV. Alhamdulillah, I still look normal. At least, I think I do! Except for the hidung sedikit kembang lah.

[4] My mak has always told me that I was born a lipas - sleeps during the day and wanders during the night. When I was a baby my mak had a scare when I was found missing from my crib around 3 a.m. She later found out that I had crawled out and found a more comfortable place to lay my head near the pasu bunga at the front door. Since I have been back in Malaysia for a week I have yet to familiarise myself with a stable sleeping cycle. I currently sleep around 8 a.m. and wake up around 3 p.m. Mak has already gotten used to this and she's more comfortable knowing that I am safely tucked in bed while her students come for daily classes lest I shock them with my Ah-Lian-jual-sayur-shorts and unruly hair early in the morning. I know for sure if they saw me they will go - "Anak ustazah macam ni ka??!!!". On the first day I was back she even suggested that I sleep in the front room, away from the class area. I must be an embarassing, pathetic daughter.

[5] Whenever I miss the UK I tune in to Meet the Kumars at No. 42 if only to feel the familiarity with which British humour is expressed and to hear their funny accents. They do the most stupidest of things to get people to laugh and yet at times I find this refreshing because it is so real. It's crooked, my feelings for British TV, because it is so boring to watch Big Brother, Meet My Folks, or I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here and yet I couldn't get enough of them. And who could forget Ready, Steady, Cook! (I know at least one other person who likes this).

[6] Currently, I have managed to, without fail, take a shower only once every day. I know it's YUCKY! but the water is so damn cold. Am missing the hot water badly! My mak's bathroom has got the hot water heater but the water runs so slowly it kills my desire to shower. All I can conclude is that I am just plain KAMBING. Too afraid of water.

[7] If you have not already done it, and are thinking of donating to the tsunami victims via SMS, I suggest you go read this first.

[8] One of my dad's cats likes to eat durians. She polished off 5 pieces of durians on her first encounter with the King of Fruits and yesterday I swear that she could smell the thing and came rushing from the kitchen into the living room, pawing my thighs while I was licking off the last of the durians. She licked the lid of the bowl holding the fruits and proceeded to paw the seeds of the durian, subsequently licking off what little bits of flesh I left on the seeds. Does she like have a mengidam phase since she is pregnant? Or is it because of the high-calorie content of the fruit that prompts her to gouge on them for the sake of her babies?

[9] I have managed to smuggle a pack of Tesco's Smoked Mackerel and it's been sitting in the freezer since forever. I promised Joe I would cook masak lemak smoked mackerel for him but since we're in the Jen-Brad situation I don't know when it will come true.

[10] I will be going to KL tomorrow so am very very open for suggestions of meetings, gatherings, eatings, shoppings, or whatever. Jom la keluar! Emi, Elixir, Armicelli, Azli, Enna, Ija, Kamy, Linda, Faezah, Janice, whoever......!

There, I managed to put in 10 ramblings. I must really be a Loser with a capital L.

Posted in: on January 09, 2005 at at 6:50:00 AM 0 comments

Before aku bersiap-siap nak balik ke Malaysia hari tu Joe pesan dengan aku satu perkara. Katanya benda ni penting sangat-sangat since kami dah plan nak kawin in the near future. Aku ni siap bayangkan dia nak suruh beli kemeja ke, tie ke, perfume ke, jam tangan ke, kasut ke, etc. Aku rasa mostly aku dah beli dah ari tu. Apa pulok dia nak lagi? Guess what -- he said just one word -- LINGERIE. Ahem, lelaki ini sungguh blue. Tapi bila aku pi jenjalan masa Christmas week tu Lond a.k.a. Linda ada gak pesan ngan aku suruh beli jugak. Dia kata lingerie kat sini lagi ok than Malaysia. Aku pon ada jugak tolong belikan untuk kakak aku masa dia nak kawin dulu. So aku pun survey la jugak benda alah called lingerie ni. Penat wo nak cari. Mana la aku nak tau type macam mana nak beli. Pada aku kalau dah kawin takyah la pakai lingerie. Bukanke birthday suit kita tu lagi sexy? Aku pusing sampai 5 kali baru jumpa apa yang aku rasa berkenan kat hati. Last-last aku beli 3 pairs. 1 camisole and shorts, 1 bra and thong, and 1 neglige and thong. So semalam masa aku kemas-kemas tu aku bukak la balik hasil shopping aku and baru aku perasan satu thong aku beli tu ada color ------------- PINK!!!!!!!!

Ashu, Mushu rasa Mushu pun nak jugak la Porsche Pink!

Posted in: on January 07, 2005 at at 5:26:00 PM 0 comments

hati aku tak senang. duduk tak senang. baring tak senang. tidur pun tak senang. mata tak boleh lelap bila fikir pasal hal tu. rasa geram pun ada. tapi dia bukan orang lain dengan aku. dia darah daging aku. dia yang melahirkan aku malah membesarkan aku. tapi hari itu nanti hari besar untuk aku. hari yang ditujukan khas untuk meraikan aku. aku aku aku. dan bakal suami aku. bukan dia. dan bukan suami dia. tapi kenapa dia masih nak berkeras? kenapa dia nak gunakan kuasa veto dia? aku keliru. mahu ikut kata hati atau mahu jadi anak mithali? aku berkira-kira kalau pun dia marah mungkin hanya sehari. lepas tu dia akan gembira. anak perempuannya yang seorang ini akan selamat berpunya. tapi otak aku juga kata kalau berkeras akan mengguris hatinya mungkin sampai bila-bila. tambahan pula aku penutup acara. dia mahu hebahkan pada kawan-kawannya. bak kata kakak aku - groupie nya, pengikut setianya. dah berpuluh majalah aku belek untuk sedapkan hati. dah bermacam cara nak naikkan seri warna pilihan hati mak aku ni. nak tahu warna apa dia pilih untuk theme color aku??? warna merah jambu!!!!!!

Posted in: on January 06, 2005 at at 5:33:00 AM 0 comments