I'm mad at myself ...

for letting what other people say affect my feelings. Indeed, what Mr Farok said should be viewed as an encouragement for me to really write the book. (And he's oh so good-looking I should be proud he cared!) But on the other hand, I can't help but feel discouraged. I feel like lying down into the foetal position. I feel so small and helpless.

(Q small break(!) Gawd....I really DID lie down in the foetal position after Asar prayers)
It's okay. At least now I'm up. And able to vent my anger here and then maybe later I'll forget about it. I'll have a good holiday wity myself and by myself. And just you wait, Mr. Farok! I'll have the first chapter by another 10 days. Till then, here's to Good Health and Prosperity!

Aku kurang bersyukur...

bila dengar cerita teman. Memang ceritanya biasa-biasa saja. Cerita susah senang zaman kanak-kanak. Cerita ibu bapa bercerai-berai atau kawin lagi. Cerita ibu yang tak ingin hidup kerana ayah kawin sembunyi. Cerita kerja sambilan di cuti sekolah untuk menampung sara hidup. Cerita main di sawah bersama lintah dan pacat. Cerita panjat pokok dan curi buah. Cerita asah pensel dengan pisau. Cerita pakai kasut sekolah sampai haus. Cerita budak nakal dan ikut kepala sendiri.

Aku kurang bersyukur bila sambil mendengar aku mencelah. Aku tak sempat merasa itu semua. Aku menyesal tak dapat melaluinya. Aku kata semua masalah itu membuat seseorang menjadi berani dan cekal. Aku kata aku dulu di jaga macam dalam kaca. Penuh teliti dan dilindungi. Aku kata lagi aku kurang kasih sayang sebab banyak pengalaman hidup aku tak lalui.

Memang aku kurang bersyukur. Aku tak bersyukur ibu bapa masih bersama. Aku tak bersyukur abang dan kakak masih mahu menjaga. Walaupun aku dah berpunya. Aku tak bersyukur masa zaman kanak-kanak cukup ceria. Apa dijanji semua dikota. Aku tak bersyukur semasa meningkat dewasa tak perlu bekerja. Mencari wang membantu biaya. Aku tak bersyukur aku boleh tinggal di rumah batu-bata. Pagi-pagi tak perlu timba air telaga.

Tapi, alhamdulillah. Aku bersyukur kerana ada teman-teman untuk bercerita. Aku bersyukur kerana dapat pengalaman melalui mereka. Aku bersyukur kerana sudah tahu ilmu yang perlu ditambah di dada. Dan aku bersyukur kerana sekarang aku sudah sedar untuk bersyukur.

One Art

by Elizabeth Bishop

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.


--Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

Wishing....


you Selamat Penganting Baru, Aida!!! I'm sorry I couldn't be there. Really. Pictures, please.

Tadi...

pegi bank dekat Section 18. Balik tu lalu la dekat hostel InTEC. Saja drive slowly in front of the hostels, the parking lot in between the Girls' and the Boys' hostels, tengok pondok guard dekat girls' hostels...kenang-kenang zaman dulu. Heheh.

Dulu kat guard tu ada sorang mak guard yang badan dia lebih besar dari seorang pak guard. Kami panggil dia Bai. Short for apa tak tau lah. Cibai ke, Kaki Tibai ke, entah! Tapi dia garang. Suka tegur girls yang pakai short sleeves. Kononnya bersalah sangat dari sisi undang-undang kolej. (Memanglah salah even dari sisi agama) Tapi yang lebih penting perangai students, bukan pakaian. Kadang-kadang they all (the girls) geram; they all pakai short sleeves, then tutup dengan cardigan (masa tu tengah trend pakai black cardigans). Bila lalu depan Bai baik jek jalan. Keluar jek dari gate dan betul-betul depan mata Bai, they all bukak cardigan dan menunjukkan dengan jelas sekali short sleeves diorang. Hahahahahaha. Bai tak leh buat apa sbb outside of the hostel compounds. Ha tu la! Nak tegur pun kena ada cara. Dia suka tengking. Tengokla sendiri tengkingan tu masuk dalam kepala the girls ke tidak. Aku pun suka buat jugak kadang-kadang. Suka nak tengok muka Bai tu tercengang campur geram. Sebab dia kurang cerdik la. Rigid sangat nak ikut peraturan. Dia tak sedar ke banyak lagi hal penting. Macam hal girls yang suka keluar gate kui 10.55 (gate tutup kui 11.00) dan tunggu boyfriend kat parking untuk pergi clubbing? Pastu tak balik bilikla. Aku pun ada jugak kuar tak balik bilik TAPI bukan clubbing. Gi tidur rumah Ah Flo sebab nak tengok Astro dan main dengan Aleya. Masa tu aku tadek kereta. So tumpang kereta Noreen. Noreen tu pun bukan drive kereta dia sendirik. Kereta kakak dia. Tapi weekends she usually has the car. Kami pi makan nasi lemak kat SS14 Subang. Masa tu Ravi famous la. Tempat bebudak lepak lepas balik clubbing. Sekarang ni dah tutup kot Ravi tu. Dia tukar kat Gazebo. Kat situ la aku punya first date dengan Joe. Muahahaha. Tak class langsung. Sampai kami baik dengan sorang waiter kat situ, nama dia Umar. Umar ni suka layan kami. Nampak jek muka kami dia terus jerit "Nasi lemak ayam sambal dua! Teh tarik dua!". Heheheh. Suka aku. Takyah tunggu waiter bangla nak amik order.

Kat parking lot in between girls' dengan boys' hostel tu dulu tempat aku first time jumpa Joe. Dia parking kat situ nak amik aku go out for the first time. Dan lepas-lepas tu selalu la jadi port untuk dia tunggu aku. Kat situ la jugak pun kami budak-budak tunggu bas pagi-pagi masa nak pegi class. Kami tu refer to orang yang tak kaya dan tak ada kereta ni. Mana-mana yang parents kaya tu dan juga yang kaki tumpang senang la naik kereta nak pegi class kat Section 17. Aku tak. So terpaksa la berebut-rebut. Bas pulak bukannya banyak. So bas yang cantik tu pun dah ropa bas mini. Sikit bulan lepas tu nasib baik ada bas mini masuk dalam area hostel tu. Bayar la 50 sen ke 30 sen dah. Aku tak ingat. So tak berasak sangat la. Time pun flexible sikit sebab bas mini tu available every half an hour tak silap aku.

Dulu masa first semester aku duk block tepi sekali. Dekat dengan gate. Warden yang duk tingkat bawah masa tu Puan Aini ke apa tah. Tapi silap la. Dia Chiep Warden. The head. Pastu skema a.k.a garang jugak. Peraturan hostel ialah tak boleh bawak masuk lelaki dalam bilik. Tapi ada sekali tu aku ajak kakak aku dengan husband dia masuk bilik. Sebab abang ipar aku tu nak tolong angkat PC masuk dalam bilik. Pastu since dah ada PC akak aku pun pesan supaya sentiasa kunci pintu bilik. Aku tak pernah pun sebelum tu kunci bilik. Aku pun test la kunci. Apa punya bengong aku masa tu pegi test kunci dengan menutup pintu bilik tu betul-betul. Sekali kunci tu jam. Akak aku dengan husband dia dengan anak dia umur setahun ada kat dalam. Aku plak kat luar. Pintu takleh bukak. Meraung anak sedara aku. Terpaksa la jumpa Puan Aini. Mintak kunci spare. Terus dia basuh aku. "Ha tu lah, tuhan nak tunjuk. Takleh bawak masuk lelaki tapi awak bawak masuk jugak. Kan dah terkurung?" Dia tak ada kunci spare. Last-last aku terpaksa kopak pintu tu. Pintu pun dah berlobang. Nak kunci apa lagi?

Macam-macam lagi la cerita pasal zaman aku kat situ. Tak sangka after seven years I am back in Shah Alam and boleh visit tempat ni during my lunch hour. Tempat jatuh lagi dikenang inikan pulak tempat jatuh cinta mueheh.

Meanwhile, saksikan video clip ini..


Orang kata ...

kalau suka bersolek ke, suka melawa ke, mungkin dapat anak perempuan. Tapi...aku mengandung ke?

A prayer...

Ya Allah, *pls give me the serenity to accept those that I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference...

* courtesy of Marc Cherry, heh.

Memanglah...

agak betul juga yek when they say sometimes other people are the ones that can see our strengths and weaknesses while we ourselves fail to see them. Thank you, sha, for having confidence in me. Aku sendiri still can't find the strength in me to pursue it --- permanent head damage? It takes a lot of guts. Tabik As ngan Shidi! Nanti kirim kat aku Norwegian Salmon hokeh?

Self discovery over KFC, anyone?

The word....

....Banana Boat will no longer be the same. And I didn't even get a single tan line.
****Romance in the pool is just that -- romantic; BUT not when there are 10 other people in the same pool
****A hairy back is not cool when it's wet. Shave, people, shave!

It wasn't the food....

it was the company. The room was cramped. The air-conditioning reminded me of winter. Yeah, it was that cold. The space was limited. The tv show was that of southern america's cocoa industry and the riches of chocolate it brought. But all was ignored as discussions abound. How best to solve that sudoku puzzle? What garments were on sale? Which RM7.50 per pair shoes were comfortable? And indeed how could one afford property in Penang when prices were skyrocketing. It was just a one day event but I found it relaxing. Ya, Man, Jijin, and especially Ajmal were wonderful. I got my dose of baby smell the whole day. That about covers my cravings for another month or so. It didn't just end there late afternoon. No, there was food to be had and have food we did. Shasha and Ishkin joined the crowd, albeit a little bit late. Dinner was just passable. But the conversations were good. Siti Nurhaliza was one topic. The success, or rather, the unsuccessfulness of a certain laksa outlet was another. I regretted that there wasn't enough time to tour the whole mall with Kak Ida. You sure have a nose for good bargains! And I'm only kidding about Siti Nurhaliza. It was actually her husband that we were talking about; how he manages to always get the million ringgit deals without even having to possess so much as an office building.

Baby steps......

towards No 6, Jalan Kristal Lima 7/70E. Heh. We're treading on new grounds. I'm afraid but somehow sometime in the near future we're gonna have to do it. Might as well rough it now. I'm plowing full steam ahead. Some people are gonna get gunned down. Some people, on the other hand, will get the full privileges of a luxury cruise. Mak, raya tahun depan yek? Abah, serai ke daun pandan?

Meanwhile, this brought some of the familiar feelings back...

Cikgu Som mengomel....

By far this is the most boring class that I've taught. You get only 9 students but you expect that some of them would be jovial and funny. At least that was the experience that I got for the past two semesters. Tapi kali ini masyaallah! how boring. The kids (some of them are actually OLDER than me!) that are intelligent and enthusiastic enough turn out to be skema, those that do look like they could make some noises in the classroom are not interested in the subject. And there is a couple that are so quiet and introverted that I just don't know whether they understand what I am jabbering about or not. But the IP addressing issues did get them stoked. I got asked a lot of questions, made to conjure case studies out of thin air. Luckily, Uncle Cisco has helped me a lot. Now I do have the extra confidence to teach especially IP addressing. But in between there were no funny jokes, no singing remarks. I kinda expected this type of crowd to be the good ones before I started teaching but now I long for the antics of Suhaimi and Ismail, and the cheekiness of Nurul and Hilmi. Guys, repeat some papers why don'tcha?

Meanwhile, check out the flowers I got for my birthday last year. Ferrerro Rocher no less!

What is it about Malaysians...

and freebies? We just LOVE them, don't we? I was at a launch party of a Learning Management System recently and I've seen a crowd build up just to get the freebies. No matter that they are not the targeted audience, that they never have and never will use the system. There were freebies to be had and they weren't shy about queuing up to get all the goodies. Or is it a universal thing?

Turnaround

It's beginning to change. My point of view, that is. Ever since I took the plunge to make myself better spiritually. I hope it keeps up. The only thing is to remember to accept the negatives as a stepping stone. I'm happy, though, that the offers have come pouring in. I hope it's a blessing. Sri Iskandar is beginning to look better. To buy or not to buy? To accept or not to accept? Can I have an ice-cream sundae and mull over it or should I go straight to the cleaners?

Bengang

Aku pegi deposit cashier's order kat machine. Boleh ke?

Blah di blah

I always get frozen at the keyboard. It seemed like ages ago since I could express myself here. Bleargh ... guess updates will be reserved for another time

Aduh....sakitnya demaaaam.....

Orang sakit, tak boleh makan ni!
I'm suffering here. This feverish sensation refuses to leave my body. Cukup makan, what? Cukup pakai, what? Apsal nak demam lagi ni? Tak laratnya. Tapi semalam demam-demam pun sempat tuang training semata-mata nak tgk Cinta The Movie.

Cinta The Movie

Nope....no reviews here. Just GO SEE IT!

X-Plore Q-Race

I'm miserable today. So damn tired after a few months of breaking my back working for this institution. Yesterday was D-Day. So after all the preparations that we have made the event finally came to be realized and it turned out pretty darn good. Discounting the long speech by our BIG BOSS, that is! The flag-off which was scheduled for 9:45 a.m. eventually was done at around 11.45 a.m.! But the teams were fast. One team recruited a 'pakcik' whom I thought looked around 50 years old but he was fit to the bone and by hour 3 he didn't show any signs of fatigue. Wish I would that fit when I turn 50. All in all, it was a pretty darn good day. Although today I'm starting to feel the effects of it. ~tired.....zzzz....zzzzz......umph what time is training again?

Peace...

and tranquility after knowing that there is a way...after all!

An Ode to Emi

You know I'm dead bored when there is the umpteenth entry for the day. I took the time to read my old posts and the comments posted by my friends. Dear Emi, in light of the recent events I hold my chin to my chest and apologize for all the wrong doings that I have done. When I read your comments I think I now feel a person screaming out for the attention of a friend. The attention that I failed to give because I was too wrapped up in some other things in my life. I do realize now that I have taken a dear old friend for granted. Whether its too late or not I hope my apologies count. Peace! Kenangan di bawah tingkap slanting.

You know you're in denial when....


the answer scripts keep piling up and none of them get marked. Meanwhile, my mind is trying to escape and stray into long untouched recesses. Of course, there is already the lingering worry with regards to the house. I am SO not kidding about that. It's a case of choosing between an unhappy future with excess and MEAN baggage or a pleasant one with me at the steering wheel. I SO wanna kill that evil person right now. She could go to hell for all I care. But, alas my faith has kept me from turning into an ugly green monster.
Ishkin turned 2 last two days. In her world there is only dolphin, mushu and uncle joe. Oh, what bliss to be ignorant....

Shoes Shoes Shoes



Female sling back, white with beaded lace trimmed front. 1 1/2 inch heels. Worn only once (my wedding day y'all!) In good condition. RM 100.





Male loafers from Next. Brand new, never been worn. Size 9. RM 120.

Online Shopping Mode Now!


This is a genuine Songket Tenun Terengganu for ladies. The size is basically the same as a pair of sarong batik and it's suitable to be paired with a chiffon beaded baju kurung or any type of transclucent material where you can show off the beautiful intricate details of the songket tenun. Going for RM 180 per pair. Interested? Leave your contacts at the comments!

For Sale

This blog has long been ignored. I might be turning it into an online shopping blog. Watch this space!

Eid Mubarak

Salam aidilfitri to you guys who know me! Ampun maaf zahir batin!

Of Cookies and Cream

There's nothing like the sweet smell of blitzed pineapple cooked with a dash of lemon and cloves. It invokes a sense of serenity, coupled with dribbling drool. And what makes it that much better is the realization that he was willing to stay up for 4 hours to finish the concoction only to wake me up when it was ready.

I only hope that the people its meant for will appreciate it as much.

My Pillow Buddy

At the dining table during iftar

Me : Apsal tanak makan lauk tu? It's only a day old.
Him: Entahlah. Bila tak fresh je susah nak lalu.
Me : Kenapa plak? Bukannya basi.
Him: Tah....tekak ni bila makanan tak fresh lalu dia mesti cakap "Excuse me..."

Journey into Journalism

This new endeavour is interesting. Maybe because I managed to get a good scoop. Thanks a lot Dr D!

Sleepyhead is sleepy.....

I drove to work today ogling a hand that was dangling out from a car window. It was a man's hand, visible only from the fingertips to the elbow, and trying to get free from the touch n go handlebars. And it wore a metal watch. Somehow I found it sexy. So masculine and yet so refined. The hand, not the person owning the hand. Heaven knows how he looks like. The watch made the hand look like it belonged to a distinguished and manly man getleman. Too bad joe's hands are so, how shall I put subtlely, errmm..... HAIRY. He couldn't put on any type of watch that has a metal bangle. The hairs on his hand might get lost somewhere in the recesses of the bangle.

*****************

Yet again, The Girls are marvelling at the joys of motherhood. The irony of it is that they would also speak of the pain. How THAT part of you down under would be prodded at and sliced and in the aftermath of it would be sewn back together like a torn pillow being mended. And yet again I sat there numbed and wide-eyed thinking about the pain and suffering. Err....can you tell me again how that relates to something joyous?! Somehow I still am not convinced of this motherhood thing. Maybe some time in the near future I'll consider it again. Like in another ten years or so.

*****************

I'm rooting for Argentina tonight. But then again, Klinnsman's team is not too shabby either. Maybe I'll see which team scores first and root for them. Whatever it is, I'm happy that France is through to the Quarter Finals! Félicitations Monsieur Henry! Je suis fier de vous. Rappelez-vous juste de marquer un but, okay?

Demam

Hari hari aku pegi tengok Anjungk. Aku nak sangat ada Anjungk. Makan Anjungk. Minum Anjungk. Tido .... hemm tak leh tido sebab teringat Anjungk.

Simpang

Last weekend aku balik kampung hubby aku. Nama tempat tu Simpang Ampat. Mengikut ceritanya nama dia Simpang Ampat sebab memang the center of the kampung ialah sebuah simpang empat. Korang tau tak Carrefour tu in French maksudnya simpang empat la. A T-Junction. So kampung hubby aku ni nama dia Carrefour la sebenarnya. Heh. Kat situ ada kedai hardware Ah Seng, ada balai polis. Itu la main landmark yang aku ingat.

Tapi semenjak gomen dah built a highway there tak ada lagi nampak identity Simpang Ampat tu. Sbb all the way memang akan ada junctions untuk exit to specific places. Bila cakap pasal the loss of Simpat Ampat's identity ni macam tu jugaklah hilangnya identity family hubby aku ni. Bila aku balik kampung kali ni aku dapat tahu ada peristiwa di sebalik the building of the highway yang go through kampung Simpat Ampat ni. Kesahnya family hubby aku ni kaya dengan tanah sawah (bukan kaya duit) yang sekarang ni kalau lalu highway tu boleh nampaklah. So bila nenek hubby aku meninggal tanah ni dah jadi tanah pusaka. Bila sebut tanah pusaka I'm sure the first thing that comes to mind is perebutan harta. Adik beradik mother in law aku rupanya hampir berbalah disebabkan tanah pusaka tu. Bila kami berkumpul untuk kenduri cousin aku di Dak Jali ni baru aku kenal mak-mak dan bapak-bapak sedara aku yg selama ni I only ever heard of from my mother in law.

Ada Along Aih anak lelaki sulung. Ada Along Yob from Seremban. Ada Alang. Ada Acik. Ada Pak Itam uncle yang ganas dan pandai nyanyi lagu Oh Fatimah. Ada Busu Lod. Kalau dengar cerita mother in law aku depa ni semua asalnya rapat. Masa anak Along Aih dengan Along Yob kawin dulu mak la yang masakkan lauk kenduri. Hubby aku dengan adik beradik dia la yang jadi kendarat ke hulu ke hilir. Sekarang ni Along Yob tak mahu salam dengan aku and hubby aku. Busu Lod tak datang langsung ke kenduri. Pak Itam dah takut takut nak borak dengan kami. Semua sebab tanah dekat simpang tu.

***********************************

Aku perasan anak anak dara Alang dengan Acik sibuk berkaraoke masa kenduri tu. Kat sini agaknya dah adat kalau kenduri kawin mesti ada karaoke. Kak Long punya comment - "Masa dulu anak dara la sibuk tolong apa yang patut. Anak dara sekarang ni agaknya layak pasang badan aje. Tunggu nak berlaki."

***********************************

Hubby aku pernah ada crush dekat Mak Itam isteri Pak Itam. Boleh tak?

Sleepyhead Tak Bangun Lagi

Aku ngantuk. Bahana terjaga pukul 4 pagi and tak boleh tido semula. Kui 8 terus bukak Star World tengok American Idol. Taylor Hicks menang. Dah agak dah. Tapi I can't help but feel disappointed for Katherine McPhee. Pompuan tu punya suara sedap siol. Semua lagu pun buleh bawak. Paling best masa dia nyanyi Somewhere Over the Rainbow. Nak nangis pun ada aku masa dengar tu. Sebab suara dia. Bukan sebab aku jiwang ke apa. Stylist American Idol ni pun pandai kasi touch up muka dia and baju dia. Aku suka tengok lipstick dia. Color mcm coral red ke apa tah. Lawa. Dresses dia pun cantik. Heels dia lagi la oh so gorgeous. Otak aku makin tak berkembang ke wei sebab dah tua baru nak minat bebenda macam ni. Dulu tak der la plak tergila gila nak tengok Pop Idol ke Malaysian Idol ke or American Idol ni. Ni kesahnya cikgu tak der keje la ni. Anak murid cuti. Roomate aku pun semua pegi kursus. Aku jek tak pegi lagi.

*********************************************************************************

Cousin aku Hakim nak kawin weekend ni. Selamat Pengantin Baru Hakim & Siti! Semoga korang dapat anak dulu keh keh. Jumpa korang kat Kuantan next week eh.

*********************************************************************************

Crossing my fingers to go to Crown Princess and INTI in August

Love Is......

when everytime before you go to bed he rubs your back just to soothe your soul

A Week Visiting The Renaissance

Things were hectic at first. But soon, it got pretty slow. To the point that my eyes couldn't quite open. Came late a few times but Wayne wasn't saying anything so I guess it was okay by him. He once called me "Queen Bee" hehehe. Well, if you think of it I put the words in his mouth but what the heck masuk bakul angkat sendiri jek lah. WooYoung was being himself. He and his laptop bag slung across his shoulders. Mahal bag tu. Penuh dengan uwang. I knicked one Samsung freebie without remorse. Wish there were more so that I could give one to Joe. Note to self: ask Ramlah about the extra bag. The Ramadhan buffet was a blast. I ate so much smoked salmon that I could cover my whole body with them. Cheese cake was oh, so heavenly. Each time we were there, FZKNeramal was there. Wish I saw it earlier. Way way earlier than 2000. But our paths didn't cross. I guess this is all Allah's plan. I just follow it. But I do pray everyday that it was different. Dr Ngo was like a father. He and his Gout feet. Don't eat too much prawn Uncle Ngo! I did hint to him to go talk to Wayne about Hanoi. Tapi fat chance la kan. Dia siapa aku siapa. Zhu finally revealed his age. 29??!!! I look like his mother! Sharad was being obscenely quiet. Padan muka. Geraldine gave him a few lashings about Baryn S Futa. Padan muka padan muka padan muka. Eeks. Balan ni kacau la. He doen't know that I'll be sharing a room with him in the future. Muahahaha. Itu pun kalau Rukmin approves. Quiet old Rukmin. Ramlah was a blast!!!!! Way to go Kak Ramlah!!! Oh and did I mention I spoke to Paul Moss? Kah kah. He got hoarded by Robana and Kiren. But I was the one who handed him his entrance. Paul, if you can keep your mouth shut you'd be much more cuter. Nice skin, by the way. And also Kak Siti Hajar of the AF hoohaa said "Sorry" to me. How cool is that? Haiyoh, gonna miss this week. Hope I get to be in the GA. Hanoi! Hanoi! Hanoi!

Look, But Dont Touch

Koi pond, water fountain, fluffy grey cat, all to look at but never to touch.....as yet hehe.....

Some day my dear padwan, some day.....

London, Tokyo, Jakarta, Seoul, Singapore

It seems I love not resting on my laurels, after all....

Endless Summer

Someone I know is missing UK. He lived there for more than 2 years. I lived there for 1 year. I can appreciate his sentiments. Somehow, life in UK seems more engaging no matter how problematic it is. Especially in the summer, I miss the smile that people give to one another freely, I miss the smell of the air, I miss the morning walks to everywhere, I miss the hello's and you alright?'s, I miss the shopping, I miss the novelty of snow/sleet/frost, I miss the autumn/spring weather - not too cold; not too hot, I miss everything.

Recently.....

I got myself worked up for this Posted by Picasa

Ok-lah tu

Datang jangan tak datang!

Revelation

Blog ni lama tak update. But my blogstats tell me that some people still visits. Some are wondering why I never update anymore. Some are probably just curious and others might just stumble upon it accidentally due to blgspot's toolbar. All this just reveals that there are some people who still cares about what happens to me. That care can either be with good intentions or malicious intent. If a TRUE friend is reading this, thanks for caring. Just let me be for a little while more. For curious and innocent readers, BE COOL!

Baru

I think I got me a new mom.

You're 3 mths old...

tomorrow. Happy Birthday Chubby Chubs! Posted by Hello

Being "Market"-able

I started very late my training in domestic skills. As the last child, mak never trusted me to do things in the kitchen, or anywhere in the house for that matter, pertaining to that of a domestic manner. During my childhood, mak would shoo me away from the kitchen whenever I asked to join the womenfolk (mak and my two older sisters) doing the cooking. Occasionally, I would be given the chance by my sisters to do the dishes (trust them to give me their dirty work!). Only when I was fast approaching adolescence did mak give me a few necessary pointers like how to cook rice, fry eggs, and cook a few basic dishes.

I do know a little more than I used to these days. Not wanting to subsist on bread and butter while I was studying abroad did help somewhat to my increased knowledge (however minimal it is) in this area. But nothing has prepared me for today. While waiting for my abah to finish his appointment at the doctor’s mak gave me an assignment. I was to buy fresh produce from the little wet market in Cenderawasih. Even from the get go, I was nervous.

I made a mental note: half a chicken, aubergines, potatoes, plus some additional vegetables up to my liking. That did not help much. I liked fresh button mushrooms, broccoli, cabbages and cauliflower. All the vegetables that have been listed as a no-no by abah’s doctor. Banyak angin, he said. How do I choose the chicken? The plump one? The one with lots of skin on it? The botak one?

Got to the market fine. But the owner looked at me funny. Must have been the wild-eyed look I had on. There were no helpers. Everyone went on their jolly way and proceeded to the counter to pay. Guess that’s what I’ll do. Aubergines, ahh there you are. Poke, poke, poke. All of them looked dead. They don’t look this limp at the Student Union back in Guildford. I managed to grab a couple of them that looked half decent; plump and no bumps on. Next, potatoes. This one’s easy. Grab a bag, choose the ones that didn’t look like aliens were growing on them and put into bag. Now the “additional vegetables” part. The only mushrooms available were shitake. Scratch that one. Remembered mak mentioning sawi minyak once and proceeded to look for anything that looked half like sawi. There were all sorts of them. Small, short ones. Long and leafy with golden flowers. Which one was with minyak? I just grabbed the ones with the flowers because they look the most fresh. Proceeded to grab a few packets of baby corns and a couple of carrots and pronounced to myself that I was done.

Now on to the poultry section. I half expected that since this is a wet market there would be cages lining the walls filled with live chickens. At least that’s what I remembered when I went to Pasar Besar Kuantan. No chicken in sight. There was no frozen section either. I was roaming around aimlessly hoping to hear chicken sounds that would clue me in on its whereabouts. Luckily, a pakcik stopped me.

With hands and legs akimbo he said, “Ha kelam kabut macam ni. Mau apa?”. Eheh. “Ayam ada ka pakcik?”. I followed him to a counter and hey presto! He pulled out one whole chicken from a container filled with ice. So that’s where they’ve been hiding. From my conversation, or at least his questioning and me nodding, I managed to decide how much I wanted the chicken (half, whole, quarter), whether I wanted it cut into 8, 12, or 24 pieces and whether I wanted the skin off or not. Previously, I only knew to order to the guy at Atiff’s store in Woking : “10 pounds money (that means 5 pounds in weight) chicken, cut into small pieces, skin off”. Even earlier than that, I knew how to grab the plumpest chicken breast from the frozen food section at Tesco Puchong.

Waiting for the pakcik to pack the chicken, I grabbed the newspaper at the nearby stand and proceeded to the counter. One lady asked what I was buying. I must have had the wild-eyed look a second time today because I didn’t know who she was. My mind went blank and I was speechless. Lifted the paper and pointed it to her. I was about to get into the car when I saw the lady again. Next to her Atos. Now I know who she is. One of my mak’s students. That’s great. I could not recognize her face but I could recognize her car. Next time I see a person I’ll ask "Ho hum I’m Sleepyhead. And what do you drive?". Come to think of it, I could have said to her, "Oh makcik so-and-so, I'm shopping for vegetables and chicken for my mak. So rajin a daughter that I am. Next thing I know my mak would probably let me skin the chicken when I get home and later on maybe even cook a decent finger licking dish out of all that I bought today!"

The term tak lepas laku suddenly comes to mind. I remember mak always mentions this to me if she deemed my behaviour unsuitable for a lady or for a girl-lady-person. Unladylike-lah! Tak semenggah, if you will. Unmarketable and unsellable to potential future in-laws and future besans. Come to think of it, my whole behaviour this morning was tak lepas laku. If I wasn’t already attached, I would have blown my chances of impressing a potential mother-in-law. (Yes, later on mak told me that the lady has a cute looking son). With my lack of wet-market skills and my speechlessness, I was simply unmarketable in all sense of the word.

On another unrelated note, Dina Zaman's Gongkapas Times in no more. How will I survive my mornings?

Dinner On Valentine's

I had dinner with my sweetie
At his home the other night
I knew he’d make a special treat
At least I hoped he might

He set out all the crockery fine
With his best linen pressed
Silver knives and forks and spoons
I really was impressed

I said “What’s for dinner honey?”
He flashed a cheeky smile
And replied “I know you’ll love it
It’ll be ready in just a while”

Well I got a little suspicious
For I noticed that no smell
Was coming from his kitchen
And no food was there as well

Nothing cooking on the stove
No sign of chicken nor fish
And he knew fettucine marinara
Was my favourite dish

The stereo played slow love songs
The candles were aglow
He certainly was cooking something up
But what? I did not know

As he led me away from the kitchen
My hopes began to crumble
When he took me to the main bedroom
I heard my tummy rumble

He set me down upon the bed
And then to my surprise
He grabbed a blood red silken tie
And wrapped it round my eyes

I started feeling worried
This was not his normal behaviour
What could be for dinner here
And what could I find to savour?

I could hear him rustling round a bit
What was taking him so long
I’d known him over five years now
But could I have judged him wrong?

Did he have a darker side?
Was he into kinky stuff?
Well everything here seemed OK
I knew I just had to trust

Then I felt his hand so gentle
As he slowly released my blindfold
I opened my eyes and before me
Was such a sight to behold

He had totally turned his body
From his crown to his toenail tip
Into a savoury sensation
And in his hand... a packet of chips

Well, I could not hold back the laughter
I was rolling about in a fit
Then he held out the packet and said,
So solemn...”Would you like a dip?”

After removing the hair from the pate
To my delight it tasted divine
And he kept a supply of japanese crackers
Propped up ‘tween his toes in a line

Well I tried the cream cheese on his fingers
His belly button mushrooms were yum
But I kept coming back for my favourite
The salsa smeared on his buns

He’d gone to a lot of trouble
To find all my favourite things
I especially liked the arrangement
Of the cheezles and onion rings

I shared all the treats with my baby
Towards the end I was starting to slow
He gave me a wink and suggested
I finish off with a big oreo

Needless to say...
There were no further courses
We sent out for pizza instead
After sweetie had showered we ate it
Propped up in our crumb filled bed

Now our relationship’s taken on new meaning
As we share in our new found delight
In fact I’ve invited my honey
For dessert round at my place tonight!

By Arcadia Flynn

I Am Well Chuffed

  • I got me a new hobby.
  • My strategy is to start out with a spin on the 10, and finish off with a straight-up with an 8.
  • 103 is not such a bad number for a beginner, is it Joe?
  • No, muttering "That #$%^ is sial" is not gonna rattle my confidence and concentration. You have such a pretty face and a nice form. Do not spoil it by opening your mouth.

Sleepyhead in Stonecold Hill

When I was just a teenager, when any of my friends or teachers asked me where I live or asked me to write my address I would do so reluctantly. I felt shameful; like an outcast. Why, u ask? Because of where I live. I consider my address a private matter simply because I consider its name indecent. So what is the repulsive name? Bukit Setongkol. Whenever I mention it I’m sure to get the obligatory sneer or two. The bold ones would ask "Eh, setongkol je bukit tu? Bukan dua tongkol?" coupled with an evil and/or sleazy laugh. And I would shudder and make myself nonexistent.

When we first moved here my mak said that Bukit Setongkol used to be all jungles and no civilization. "Tempat jin bertendang ni dulu", she would say (kenapa bertendang? bukan tidur ke dating ke). On the way to our house, there is one plot of land that houses a chinese cemetery. That was the only piece of highland I could see. Memang macam setongkol jer bukit tu. Jirat cina, they call it. I guess that is the culprit that has warranted this place its name. The cemetery has long been the center of a few dozen ghost stories enhancing Bukit Setongkol's bad repute.

Near the cemetery is a small pottery factory churning out plant pots of all shapes and sizes. A few minutes' car ride would take us to a grocery shop that turns into a kueh stall by late afternoon. The shop is connected to an adjoining house, the owner’s obviously. Especially during ramadhan, dozens of cars would stop by and buy the kueh as well as some grocery. Across the shop is a small surau. Every Thursday, a Quran recital class is held for the local womenfolk. My mak has been the guest teacher a few times. Beside the surau is the Tok Penghulu's house, Pak Cik Yem's his name short for Karim. He used to own the Teruntum Bakery in town. Just ahead, there is a stall selling kuih bahulu. The bahulu are cooked at the stall itself and if you’re early you could watch it being cooked and then immediately buy the freshly cooked bahulu. The owner's name is Mak Cik Kiah and every afternoon Mak Cik Kiah's mother would sit in one corner, regaling stories of times passed. I don’t know her name but Mak Cik Kiah said that her mother is partially blind. Yet, she manages to recognize the voices of regular customers. If my mother visits she would yell my mother's name from afar and jovially ask about my grandmother, an old friend of hers.

In the 90's a chain of supermarkets called Tunas Manja was slowly creeping up into every neighborhood, Bukit Setongkol included. Our local Tunas Manja was situated in a row of shop houses next to the Shell petrol station. In the beginning, that was the second shophouses available in Bukit Setongkol, after the one in Cenderawasih. Next to Tunas Manja is a photo processing shop, a cyber café and a clinic. There is also a restaurant aptly named Restoran Nasi Lemak. I’m sure u know its specialty by now. Across from Tunas Manja, a new row of shophouses has been built housing a car tyre servicing shop, a furniture shop, another clinic and a few others which I fail to remember just now. The residence area near Tunas Manja is called Taman LKNP. This is where our old house is and it is now occupied by my soon-to-be-married brother. My abah's best friend, Haji Mat also lives here. He used to be in the army as a cook and now visits us everyday to give us different dishes like soto ayam, lontong, mi kari or mi bandung.

Now, you could call Cenderawasih a small town. It is situated right at the edge of Bukit Setongkol near the border of Indera Mahkota and Tanah Putih. Rows after rows of residences have been built which contributed to the rising number of its population. A large mosque with gold domes and turrets has also been recently built. This is where the local residents usually perform the solat aidilfitri or aiduladha. The field adjacent to the mosque is where you could watch teenage boys spend their evening chasing around a ball. In one of the houses in front of the field, there is a local bridal shop. Abang Mie runs the shop. You could only visit the shop by appointment as all of its staff are usually busy. "Kitorang semua ada operasi hari ni." Abang Mie would say sometimes. By operasi he means out about town making up a particular bride’s face so that she looks immaculate on the day of her wedding. The bridal collection is pretty decent. Plus, you could pic n mix the bridal packages that are offered.

Just at the entrance to Cenderawasih there is a tomyam stall and an ayam golek stall. These stalls operate from late afternoon till midnight. They are rarely empty. Around there somewhere is also the large house of the local businessman. He owns a few logging companies and a few petrol stations. He is married to the sister of the Sultan of Pahang. I had the opportunity to visit the house a few times as his daughter was a good friend of mine. Nadia is now married and working as an Interior Designer in KL.

Now, when I talk to a couple of friends and tell them I live in Bukit Setongkol there is no more jeers or sneers. They seem to be familiar with Bukit Setongkol. One still remembers the yummy roti canai shop (pakai marjerin bukan butter) at the edge of Bukit Setongkol, at the junction of Jalan Haji Joned and Jalan Wong Ah Jang. The other used to organize a student union election here and remembers the government quarters lining the main road. It is not so bad, living here. I don’t get embarrassed anymore. I could live at home without ever going out to the town for about two weeks. Why should I? Everything I need is here. The good company like my friends and family. The local grocery shops that cater to all my needs. The petrol for my car to shuttle between home and Cenderawasih. It’s all good.

Seen Near the Tauhu Bakar Stall

It was late evening. We were fishing out the last remnants of the tauhu bakar special (RM 3.50 with dried sotong). Out of nowhere came this deep buzzing sound gaining the attention of all the patrons of the row of food stalls. Slowly but surely 3 big bikers passed by and stopped right smack behind where we were sitting. One was Honda CBR, the other Yamaha whose model I forgot and yet the other one (model unknown). The proud riders of these big bikes were trying to find parking space for their glamorous bikes and without giving it much thought announced that the best place to park his bike was right behind my fiancé. They proceeded to do just that, with one rider not forgetting to ram his engine sending off fumes and heat to my fiancé's head, lest no one in the vicinity of the whole neighbourhood notices his BIG and oh-so-gempak bike. Little did I know that while the rude rider did this, my fiancé, nursing his wounded soul and his teh tarik gelas besar silently cursed the rider under his breath.

The riders, after parking their bikes with glee, stood around waiting for an empty table to surface. It seemed suddenly that everyone was eating very slowly and politely and managed to find just one more crumb under the banana leaf to nibble on. No one was leaving their table. The riders, getting anxious by the minute, enhanced their presence by laughing loudly with each other. That's right, the oh-look-at-us-big-bikers laugh. It seems that their antics were in vain since not one table was left empty. Frustrated, the leader of the pack decided to find another place to show off their big guns.

First one, then the other started to leave. There was only one rider left - the one exactly behind my fiancé. Just as his friends passed by him and thereby leaving him, he started his engine. Click. No sound. Another click. Still no sound. His shoulders slumped a little and his neck was bowed down. Third click and it was certain. His batteries ran out. All this while I've watched his antics and the laughter is just bubbling inside my chest. This rider took off his helmet again and proceeded to disappear. After finally failing to find another bit of nutty chilly sauce, we decided to call it a night. As we were walking towards the car, we found a slightly amusing surprise. The rider was hunched up against a phone booth obviously trying to call his friends to come back and help him with his bike!

Moral of the story Versi Baik:
Baik beli battery handphone daripada beli motor besar. Kalau takder tempat nak makan pon boleh lagi pakai handphone untuk call delivery.

Moral of the story Versi Kurang Baik:
Padan muka hang!

Butterflies in My Tummy

I panic a lot. And quickly. Ever since I was a kid I can't help feeling nervous when I encounter a new thing or anticipate a new event, good or bad. My hands feel all clammy and sweaty. My stomach feels like some lost butterfly is inside trying to get out and tickling me pink. It it gets too bad, I get cramps and sometimes feel like either peeing or pooping.

I'm afraid this will affect me. When I get nervous I forget what I was thinking or was trying to articulate. It's not always bad for me, though. When I was in the story telling competition, and later on the debate team this clammy nervousness has often helped me. I get so cranked up that I practice constantly to get the panic attacks out of my mind. The minute I stepped up to the stage everything inside my head just vanished. I get this fuzzy feeling of tranquility. I might not remember my speech, but no matter, cuz it has been transported to my mouth. It's like a motor reflex. I just managed to articulate whatever it is that I had practised. Then it ends, I just get all warm inside. Then it hit me - why did I go to all the trouble getting all nervous?

The panic attacks are coming to me now. But this time it's different. It comes with just slightest feeling of uncertainty. I am now unsure of myself. Will I come out of this alive or will it just eat me all up and leave me an empty skull. I wonder what tomorrow brings....

Postponed

to a much much later date. Possibly never at all. Maybe I should consider cohabitation and the hell that is guaranteed to come with it.

Better La8 than Never

Guess who finally has a Gmail account? *grins*
For 1GB email accounts go here and here.

Faraway

 Posted by Hello

Jolted

What happens when your seemingly normal everyday life might be rendered askew with the thoughts of just a few months to live?
Damn, the mosquitoes are overly active this week.
Happy Holiday KL-ites.

Exposed

I might have been discovered by my sister. Erh...Kak Nona, if you are reading this, yes, it IS your little sister. Eheh.

Apparently...

I am a princess.

Lovey - dovey or not?

I created a different entry but I changed my mind. Ask Elixir.

Academic Excuse

Is this an attempt at making an excuse for not cleaning your bedroom sound scientific? Hey, I'm in! At least for a day or two.

Trauma

Patutla semalam dia manja sangat dengan aku. Seronok hati aku tengok dia manja. Dia datang duduk dekat dengan aku. Kesian jugak tengok dia. She just lost her babies. When I first met her during Eidul Fitri I think she was just a few weeks pregnant. My sis kata teenage pregnancy. Yer lah. Muda sangat aku tengok dia tu. Badannya kecil genit. Abah kata macam Mak De aku yang tingginya tak sampai 5 kaki tu. Muka dia memang la comel. Agaknya sebab tu la cepat sangat mengandung.

Dia datang baring sebelah aku. Aku usap-usap kepala dia sampai dia tertidur. Kadang-kadang dia terjaga sambil meracau macam mengigau. Masa aku tengok dia macam tu aku rasa sebak. Mesti dia teringatkan anak-anak dia. Bila dia terjaga tu mesti dia pandang aku ibarat bertanyakan aku mana anak-anaknya. Aku tak tau nak jawab apa. Bukan salah aku dan pasti bukan salah dia. Abah dah usaha.

Aku masih tak puas ingat waktu aku duduk dengan dia tu. Pagi tadi aku bangun lambat. Selalunya aku terjaga sebab dengar suara Abah mengomel suruh dia makan. Dia ni pemilih sikit bab-bab makan ni. Itu tak mahu, ini tak nak. Makan ikut mood. Macam Kak Nona aku jugaklah. Sebab tu Kak Nona kurus agaknya. Tapi pagi tadi macam tak dengar pulak suara Abah berleter. Suara dia pun aku tak dengar. Aku bangun macam biasa. Bila keluar bilik tak rasa macam ada apa-apa yang kurang. Bila Joe telefon dan bertanyakan pasal dia pun aku jawab "Adalah tu, agaknya dekat luar". Lepas tu aku buat hal aku dalam bilik. Tak terasa pun nak bertanya khabar dekat dia. Takperlah, malam karang boleh jenguk dia; itulah kata hati aku.

Lepas maghrib aku keluar bilik. Nampak abah duduk berteleku depan tv. Suara dia macam serak. "Dik, pegi la makan sate. Mak ngan abah dan makan". Itu aje suruhan dia. Aku masuk dapur, ambil apa yang patut dan letak makanan depan tv. Aku teringat pulak nak alihkan mesin jahit dari bilik aku pegi ke bilik Kak Ida. Mak baru lepas sembahyang dalam bilik tu. Aku tak terduga mak nak tegur. "Dik, abah dah hantar Eid dengan Seb pegi pasar. Semalam dia gaduh dekat luar sampai abah tak boleh tidur...". Baru aku terpikir patutlah abah macam sedih. Macam orang hilang anak. Aku terduduk. Mula-mula aku rasa okey tapi lama-lama tak okey. Aku basuh pinggan kat dapur pun ternampak pinggan yang Eid selalu guna untuk makan. Dah elok terletak dekat tempat basuh pinggan. Selalu pinggan tu bukan dekat situ.

Aku tak tahan. Tak boleh tidur. Aku teringat kucing aku Eid. Sedih, trauma, risau. Agaknya apa lah dia makan kat Pasar Besar Kuantan tu? Memang la banyak ikan. Tapi boleh ke dia survive? Aku takut dia culture shock. Si Seb tu lagi sekor. Dah la lembut. Jantan tapi lembut. Badan dia tu dah berparut sebab asyik luka bergaduh. Aku tak sempat say goodbye pun dekat Eid. Eid yang baru kematian 3 ekor anak. Tak ada lagi la aku nak bukak pagar dengan ada 2 ekor kucing greet aku. Tak ada lagi aku nak gomol gomol badan comel si Eid tu dengan badan parut si Seb. Tak ada lagi la aku nak dengar abah aku berleter suruh Eid dengan Seb makan. Tak ada. Tak ada. Semua tak ada. Tolong! Aku tak tahan. Trauma!!!!

Weekend Drive

Top 10 songs that Sleepyhead sings along to, to keep Sleepyhead from falling asleep while driving
(in no particular order)

1. Hey Ya - Outkast
Lagu Boyfriend Elixir

2. Crazy In Love - Beyonce Knowles
Lagu joget sexy

3. She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Lagu jiwang as suggested by Joe

4. Let's Get It Started - Black Eyed Peas
And runnin' runnin', And runnin' runnin', And runnin' runnin' (ulang 100x)

5. Welcome to My Life - Simple Plan
On the edge of breaking down, and noone's there to save you

6. Superstar - Jamelia

7. Dumb - 411
Diggy-diggy-di-dumb di-dumb

8. Nobody's Home - Avril Lavigne

9. These Words - Natasha Bedingfield
Lagu tema road trip Stoke-On-Trent and Loch Ness

10. Move Your Body - Nina Sky
Oye Mi Canto!

And It's All Coming Back to Me Now....

It's still the same. That old guard house still standing in the same position with its occupants. Only this time one of them sports a bald head. The stairway to the above level had its rails painted in orange. The trees that lined the walkway have grown to become lush and green, creating some sort of a gateway to unforeseen haven. Out in the clearing, you could hear the flow of the water making its full circle from the source out into the pool and back again to be reprocessed. Only after you took the short flight of stairs will you actually see the pool. This was once where I spent my lonely evenings, pretending to be a small child again, remembering the day my abah plonked me in the muddy waters of rural KT. When the other occupants of 3D-04-09 were busy at their place of work or making their way home or buying dinner, I was alone there, or sometimes accompanied by a few slitted-eyes persons.

The stairs to the apartment block was also still the same. Only this time it had the distinct smell of cat poo or pee, I can't distinguish which, maybe both. I see a few more cats littering about underneath the many cars. The balcony had the same clothesline. The kitchen still houses the cute fridge courtesy of izzie, now married and awaiting the arrival of a baby. It had a bit more instant noodles, I noticed, probably because its current occupants are too busy to cook. But I do hear stories of a certain occupant who went on a diet and was intent on cooking vegetable soup every night for dinner.

This was once where I belonged. The place where I begun my journey of an adult life, earning a living and paying bills. Where I laid my head to sleep at night before continuing my life's routine the next day. I meet its current occupants and although I have known them for like a lifetime I still feel a bit shy at times, not knowing how to start a conversation with them. I wish I could be more friendly, or even more uninhibited. That will probably come soon.

It seemed unfamiliar at first but it's all coming back to me now.

Weekend Wanderings and Ramblings

[1] I watched Jalan-Jalan Cari Makan on TV3 and its compere, Maria Tunku Sabri expressed her fondness of crabs (not the STD!). I myself cannot go to a seafood place without tasting the tiniest pinch of crab meat. A new haunt I discovered - a steamboat restaurant near KLCC called Seafood Terminal. An all you can eat buffet costs RM 38.00 and the selections include all the seafood you can eat(with or without marinade), steamed rice, chee cheong fun, and desserts. The marinade for the seafood is spicy and yummy. You can have a choice of chicken soup or tomyam.

[2] Having been bombarded with questions and lectures with regards to this by my parents, I have partially unintentionally let out my anger on Joe. We are currently separated (ahem! like brad pitt and jen aniston). I'm sure sooner or later we'll get back together (more like sooner rather than later). This always happens when I am under stress.

[3] I have never known myself to mouth bad or dirty words. Seems I did not know myself or my limits until yesterday when I uttered the word B-A-B-I. I slept dreaming of becoming one of those fat, furry swines I saw in The Farm on Five TV. Alhamdulillah, I still look normal. At least, I think I do! Except for the hidung sedikit kembang lah.

[4] My mak has always told me that I was born a lipas - sleeps during the day and wanders during the night. When I was a baby my mak had a scare when I was found missing from my crib around 3 a.m. She later found out that I had crawled out and found a more comfortable place to lay my head near the pasu bunga at the front door. Since I have been back in Malaysia for a week I have yet to familiarise myself with a stable sleeping cycle. I currently sleep around 8 a.m. and wake up around 3 p.m. Mak has already gotten used to this and she's more comfortable knowing that I am safely tucked in bed while her students come for daily classes lest I shock them with my Ah-Lian-jual-sayur-shorts and unruly hair early in the morning. I know for sure if they saw me they will go - "Anak ustazah macam ni ka??!!!". On the first day I was back she even suggested that I sleep in the front room, away from the class area. I must be an embarassing, pathetic daughter.

[5] Whenever I miss the UK I tune in to Meet the Kumars at No. 42 if only to feel the familiarity with which British humour is expressed and to hear their funny accents. They do the most stupidest of things to get people to laugh and yet at times I find this refreshing because it is so real. It's crooked, my feelings for British TV, because it is so boring to watch Big Brother, Meet My Folks, or I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here and yet I couldn't get enough of them. And who could forget Ready, Steady, Cook! (I know at least one other person who likes this).

[6] Currently, I have managed to, without fail, take a shower only once every day. I know it's YUCKY! but the water is so damn cold. Am missing the hot water badly! My mak's bathroom has got the hot water heater but the water runs so slowly it kills my desire to shower. All I can conclude is that I am just plain KAMBING. Too afraid of water.

[7] If you have not already done it, and are thinking of donating to the tsunami victims via SMS, I suggest you go read this first.

[8] One of my dad's cats likes to eat durians. She polished off 5 pieces of durians on her first encounter with the King of Fruits and yesterday I swear that she could smell the thing and came rushing from the kitchen into the living room, pawing my thighs while I was licking off the last of the durians. She licked the lid of the bowl holding the fruits and proceeded to paw the seeds of the durian, subsequently licking off what little bits of flesh I left on the seeds. Does she like have a mengidam phase since she is pregnant? Or is it because of the high-calorie content of the fruit that prompts her to gouge on them for the sake of her babies?

[9] I have managed to smuggle a pack of Tesco's Smoked Mackerel and it's been sitting in the freezer since forever. I promised Joe I would cook masak lemak smoked mackerel for him but since we're in the Jen-Brad situation I don't know when it will come true.

[10] I will be going to KL tomorrow so am very very open for suggestions of meetings, gatherings, eatings, shoppings, or whatever. Jom la keluar! Emi, Elixir, Armicelli, Azli, Enna, Ija, Kamy, Linda, Faezah, Janice, whoever......!

There, I managed to put in 10 ramblings. I must really be a Loser with a capital L.

In the Pink



Before aku bersiap-siap nak balik ke Malaysia hari tu Joe pesan dengan aku satu perkara. Katanya benda ni penting sangat-sangat since kami dah plan nak kawin in the near future. Aku ni siap bayangkan dia nak suruh beli kemeja ke, tie ke, perfume ke, jam tangan ke, kasut ke, etc. Aku rasa mostly aku dah beli dah ari tu. Apa pulok dia nak lagi? Guess what -- he said just one word -- LINGERIE. Ahem, lelaki ini sungguh blue. Tapi bila aku pi jenjalan masa Christmas week tu Lond a.k.a. Linda ada gak pesan ngan aku suruh beli jugak. Dia kata lingerie kat sini lagi ok than Malaysia. Aku pon ada jugak tolong belikan untuk kakak aku masa dia nak kawin dulu. So aku pun survey la jugak benda alah called lingerie ni. Penat wo nak cari. Mana la aku nak tau type macam mana nak beli. Pada aku kalau dah kawin takyah la pakai lingerie. Bukanke birthday suit kita tu lagi sexy? Aku pusing sampai 5 kali baru jumpa apa yang aku rasa berkenan kat hati. Last-last aku beli 3 pairs. 1 camisole and shorts, 1 bra and thong, and 1 neglige and thong. So semalam masa aku kemas-kemas tu aku bukak la balik hasil shopping aku and baru aku perasan satu thong aku beli tu ada color ------------- PINK!!!!!!!!

Ashu, Mushu rasa Mushu pun nak jugak la Porsche Pink!

Hitam, putih, atau warna warni

hati aku tak senang. duduk tak senang. baring tak senang. tidur pun tak senang. mata tak boleh lelap bila fikir pasal hal tu. rasa geram pun ada. tapi dia bukan orang lain dengan aku. dia darah daging aku. dia yang melahirkan aku malah membesarkan aku. tapi hari itu nanti hari besar untuk aku. hari yang ditujukan khas untuk meraikan aku. aku aku aku. dan bakal suami aku. bukan dia. dan bukan suami dia. tapi kenapa dia masih nak berkeras? kenapa dia nak gunakan kuasa veto dia? aku keliru. mahu ikut kata hati atau mahu jadi anak mithali? aku berkira-kira kalau pun dia marah mungkin hanya sehari. lepas tu dia akan gembira. anak perempuannya yang seorang ini akan selamat berpunya. tapi otak aku juga kata kalau berkeras akan mengguris hatinya mungkin sampai bila-bila. tambahan pula aku penutup acara. dia mahu hebahkan pada kawan-kawannya. bak kata kakak aku - groupie nya, pengikut setianya. dah berpuluh majalah aku belek untuk sedapkan hati. dah bermacam cara nak naikkan seri warna pilihan hati mak aku ni. nak tahu warna apa dia pilih untuk theme color aku??? warna merah jambu!!!!!!

Al-Fatihah

I was sitting on the bed, aimlessly channel surfing (yeah, all 5 channels!) when the news came out. I guess I was one of the few persons who received the news about its early stages. Kak Anne went straight on the Internet to read more. They did not report that Malaysia was involved but alas, later on I found out that it had taken the lives of approximately 63 people from Penang, Kedah and Selangor. Let's pray and hope for the best for those people involved in this disaster.

And a few days back Joe's father passed away. Heart complications. Be strong, my dear. God loves him more than the rest of us. May his soul rest in peace.

Look what the stork brought...

stork


You could probably guess that I'm bored to death with this umpteenth entry for today. Thought this might be as a good a time as any to announce the arrival of my third niece Aryssa Rizqin. Her mom is still contemplating putting a 'Puteri' in front of her name. She does not want to, but Qin Qin's sister has it and Qin Qin's grandmom has insisted upon it. We'll see how it goes when she gets back to Malaysia and has to register her name in the Home Ministry.

Qin


(p/s)And congratulations to As and Shidi -- they're gonna have a baby!


(p/p/s)congratulations too to Ifa and Syumi -- hope their baby will come soon.

Lemony Snicket's: A Series of Unfortunate Events


I totally dig this movie. Enuff sed.

I confess...

that I fell asleep in the middle of the movie. It has been two days since Judgment Day and I have been letting my guards down where it concerns my sleep cycle. So can you blame me? Erm..maybe but it was half past 5 and both inside and outside it was dark. A sleep conducive environment. Plus the Phantom was getting on my nervers going on and on about his ugly face and how the world discriminated against him.

But short nap aside, The Phantom of the Opera was a pleasant movie adaptation from the original novel written by Gaston Leroux. Gerard Butler plays the Phantom, whose face was disfigured from birth and was named as the Devil's Child because of his misfortune. Pitied by a young ballerina, Madame Giry (Miranda Richardson), he was taken to the Opera Populaire, the French Opera House and hid in the deep recesses of the building. He grew to be an obsessed adult who knows only the world of the opera. Enter the damsel in distress Christine (Emmy Rossum), a daughter of a former violinist who was training as a chorus girl. The Phantom was determined for her to advance as the lead role of the Opera House. The film revolves around the Phantom's obsession with Christine, trying to make her his eternal bride while at the same time Christine is falling in love with the Opera's patron Vicomte de Chagny (Patrick Wilson).

The musical score was remarkable, except for a few annoying rock-style rendition of the main theme. The cast was commendable, but I did not have any knowledge of their previous performance to compare them to. All in all it was an enjoyable evening, short naps, runny nose and all. Street creds goes to Huneydew. Thanks for inviting me. Lepas ni ajak la lagi.

More Pics By the Beach








Is it due to lack of anything better to write about?

Weekend Activity



I remember being told by my brothers and sisters about how every weekend my abah and mak would take all of them to the beach, any beach in our hometown. The four of them would go swimming together. My dad was an avid swimmer and he taught all of my siblings how to swim. The were like fish in the sea. Mak would cook up a storm knowing that her kids would be famished after hours of being in the water. Her usual fare and favorite among our family was nasi lemak. During this time, I wasn't even conceived. I must have been up there in the heavens being told by God that my time hasn't come yet.


When I came along, they were growing up to be teenagers and soon were caught up with their studies. I guess my abah and mak also felt a little older and they stopped taking their kids to the beach; so I missed out on that experience. I remember my abah only taught me how to swim ONCE; one sunny morning in the cold water of a small river in rural KT. He just held me in a horizontal position and dropped me in the water and expected me to float. I must have choked in a gazillion gallon of water. Yeah, I know it was extreme but it was the most fun experience of learning how to swim. I miss those moments and I wish that I was born sooner if only for the desire to experience what my siblings experienced with mak and abah.


Now, my first brother has taken to following abah's footsteps. As a first child, he's taken on the role of a responsible son, or in my mak's words, anak yang taat by calling my parents every week and making it a point to visit them at least once every month. And, being a good dad that he is, he never fails to bring his kids to the beach. Granted, my nieces and nephew are not swimmers yet but they take to the water like it was their elixir of life (ahem!). The little one has only now started to learn to immerse herself in deep water and I reckon she too will soon be an eager beaver in the water.


In retrospect, although I did not get to experience the more rigorous activities that abah and mak had taught my brothers and sistes I guess they had other ways of showing me how to have fun. Like how abah taught me how to ride the motorbike and how mak taught me how to sew. It's been ages since I rode abah's kapcai and god knows I could not sew to save my life; but I know that in some ways it was my parents' way of showing me the little things that are part of their lives that I would no doubt remember when I think of them until the day I die.

Temporary Respite

Okay, so most of it are over. For a little while, I can rest my feet,

,

clear my clutter,

,

and sit back and enjoy a meal with a good book.

.

In case any of you were wondering, the shoes are Bata, the striped socks and gloves are New Look, the pencil Faber-Castell, the dish was pan-fried Tesco salmon on McCormick's lemon butter sauce and butter sauteed Tesco mixed vegetables..and the book Marian Keyes' Sushi for Beginners..and oh!..the plate, is from Everyday, I think, courtesy of Nagakayu and Elixir. (ahem, talk about name-dropping). I could get used to this. Alas, the Judgement Day is yet to come. Have a good weekend folks!

Manipulation

It could happen to the best of persons. No, I don't mean BEING manipulated but rather being the person who MANIPULATES. Personally, I don't care much for people who manipulate others solely to satisfy their own needs. Oh, don't get me wrong; I may accept the notion of a barter trade, simply put, If you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. However, I simply could not condone the act of pure manipulation. You put a person into a situation where he/she does not want to be or is unwilling to be in. It is not a commendable act. For one, it compromises that person's opinion of you; and two, it would lead to only temporary happiness.

Dear God, may those people kiss the ground they spit on.

Untuk kamu.....

No one knows how to love me quite like you do

When it comes down to the things i like
Boy, you know just how to satisfy me
You pick me up when i'm down, you put my feet on solid ground
And you make me your first priority

When there are clouds on a rainy day
You know how to bring sunshine to my life
And i've never felt this way before
You make me feel like i'm your goddess

Aaliyah
No One Knows How to Love Me Quite Like You Do

This is how it goes...

so the weather has been awful so far. That's the first bad news since I landed. I knew it was too good to be true. First it was at the immigrations. I was sweating buckets worrying if I wouldn't be let into this cold damp country. What with my wheezing cough and horrid sweaty face. Indian looking Britsh officer said Hi and I hello'd back. How long are you gonna stay? Approximately a month, sir. Finished your bachelor's degree? (confused but flattered) Ahem, yes. What's your purpose of coming here? Erm to take exams. Ok, have a good evening. (Yay!!!!) You too, cheers. It went like a breeze. Not like the first time I was here. Felt like a farm animal. Must have been the multiple stamps from myriad of European countries on my passport, eheh. Next, received a call from Kelana Convoy tour guide, Mr S. Assalamualaikum. Waalaikummussalam. Weh ko dah sampai ka? Ya, ya baru keluar terminal 3. Ohoh. Hah Tunggu...sweet sue ngan classmate ko akan amik ko. Hah! Ye ke? Ya ya. Tenkiu Mr S. Okok no problem. Yay! Saves me from taking the Woking Railair. Next, called sweet sue. Kat mana tu? Nak masuk parking. Akak tunggu kat 'Pick up Only'. Okok. Blue Ford Escort passes by. Three people came out. Huh? Sani boy? I thought it was gonna be Lond. Sleepyhead, how are you? Same old greeting from Sani Boy. Good, nice to see you. Salam salam. hug hug (not with Sani Boy lah!) and get into car. Next, Sweet Sue suggested. Nak gi Mawar? Akak mana tau jalan. Sani, do u want to taste Malaysian food? What? At this hour? Yes. Alright, let's gamble. After about an hour and a half reach deserted parking lot. Car got parked. Took coat. Got out. Hot damn! or rather Fricking freezing damn! The weather was cooooooldd. My cough got worse. My lungs hurt and my breasts were sporting goosebumps (Kinkiness not intentional). They say it's gonna be one cold winter here. But at least I got my first meal here in the form of Nasi Goreng Special Mawar and Mango juice, served by Mr. S no less! So yeah...that is how it goes.

It's the Thought That Counts

I've never thought about the little things that goes into organising small meetings or gatherings, until last night. Be it a formal one or a casual little get together organised among old friends. The nice little gesture of inviting a person to come to a meeting, the calling or Yahoo Messaging of other guests, the coordinating of time and venue, the effort of getting the presents, the thought that goes into decorating the presents, the cards, the well-wishes; all blends together to create a pleasant little surprise that warms the heart. Thank you guys for last night!

Reflections

Okeh, it's been, what?, a month and 9 days that I've been home here in Malaysia. Each passing day I try to suppress my feelings and the urge to pour it all out here. But now haunted by my sleepless nights and restless days I've decided to let it out. Biarlah. Bak kata si dia ni, tulis je. Truth is, I miss Surrey! Or rather, the life I had in Surrey. Memang la best balik rumah. U finally get to see your beloved Mom, Dad, and kucing Botbot. Tapi.....

1. Terasa bila mak tak makan the meals I cooked every other day.
2. Sedih bila mak tak kasi keluar rumah on the basis of traffic jam. I am, for god's sakes, old enough to have my own family
3. Rindu of my serene, calm morning walks to work when every other soul is still under their covers waiting for the sun to come up
4. Miss bellowing "Good Morning!" down the hall to whomever it is you see. Val ke, Maddy ke, Janet ke, even the scary Ruth.
5. Teringin nak rasa again the walk back from work and you feel eager to meet your mates and get together in the kitchen to have lunch
5. Teringat-ingat at the unpredictable weather where you get to play guessing games over what to wear to go outside. Do I wear that blue hooded top, or, that Laura Ashley denim jacket, or, a light sweater, or just a plain t-shirt?
6. I even miss taking a shower in Stag Hill with its secluded shower stall where you feel like you are safe from prying eyes and the water is just the right tempeeature. Nice and really really really hot.
7. Meleleh air liur terkenang Tesco's trifle and creme caramel and danish.
8. Kaki gatal nak tawaf the aisles of Tesco, Marks & Spencer, Next, New Look, Laura Ashley, The Friary, Anatomy, Woolworths, Robert Dyas, Waterstones, Boots, Superdrug, even QS.
9. Pinggang tunggu nak sakit sebab daki bukit High Street and North Street.
10. Tunggu bila masa lagi nak pegi Enterprise, jumpa Toby and plan a road trip to anywhere.

Satu benda saja tak terkenang --- STUDY. Kih kih.

Huneydew, the grass is always greener kat Mesia sbb Mesia tadek Autumn atau Winter. Eheh. But nevertheless, enjoy the brown grass in UK while it lasts. Lepas ni boleh sambut birthday and raya kat Mesia bertahun tahun.

Selamat Menghayati Hujung Ramadhan and Selamat Hari Raya.

Mari Belajar Bahasa

Me : Do you know what kontol actually means in Indonesian?
Him : No, what?
Me : It means having sex!
Him : Oh. And do you know what gampang means in Indonesian?
Me : Someone or something bad, I think.
Him : No. It means ordinary, like, biasa ajer lah. Kinda like
sokmo in the east coast.
Me : You've got it wrong there. Sokmo means selalu. Like always.
Him : Oh, okay. Well then, when we get married lets kontol sokmo!
Me : Gampang aja!

Hope

A new development in bone science. Maybe there is still hope for Mummy.

Insaflah....

Semalam keinginan aku menjadi-jadi. Bak kata fidzan melantun-lantun. Tak boleh nak tahan. Malam sebelumnya aku tak leh tido pikirkan apa aku harus buat keesokan hari. Joe telefon tanya jadi ke tidak plan. Aku kata "Jadi, jangan tak jadi!". Busan busan tak boleh tido aku belek intisari rancangan tv untuk esok. Nasib baik nothing much on. Akak kan jadi couch potato sepenuh masa sekejap. Ada ulangan The Apprentice which I missed tapi tak apalah. Tak lauk pon. Eh, silap tak luak pon. Lapar!

Jantung berdebar la jugak. Nak di "tak jadikkan" plan aku rasa rugi. Hati meluap-luap mengenangkan what happened last time. Daripada aku lepaskan peluang ni dan melopong baik aku try. Kalau tak dapat I could say to myself that I at least tried. Aku berkira-kira baju apa aku nak pakai besok. Almaklumla ada orang yang agak penting nak tengok aku (note: bukan jumpa tapi tengok). Dengarnya orang tu nak pastikan rupa aku ni sebab orang kata (bukan aku kata) aku dah banyak berubah. Kembang semangkuk la jugak bontot aku time aku guling-guling atas katil tu.

Otak aku laju merencana aktiviti untuk hari esok. Takut dan gementar pon ada. Sebab plan ni berisiko. Kot tersalah langkah mungkin memudaratkan hati, perasaan, nyawa dan juga kasut color turquoise aku. Last-last aku tak sedar pon aku terzzz. Sedar sedar tepon aku bunyi. Oh alarm clock aku call nak suruh bangun. Sayang betui aku kat alarm clock aku ni. Aku bangun pastu pack apa yang patut. Aku simbah sana simbah sini. gosok mana yang berkarat pastu sembur sana sini sikit. Siap. Jeng jeng jeng. Saat di tunggu dah tiba. Aku kena tabahkan hati bukak pintu bilik nih. Aku keluar toleh kiri kanan. Takde orang pulak. Mana depa ni? Aku dengar suara abah aku tengah ajar budak mengaji. Alah abah tu kacang ajek. Yang sorang lagi ni yang aku gemuruh sikit ni. Sekali tu aku dengar bunyi orang flush toilet. Yay! Mummy aku berak! Aku capai kunci Cik Tot terus keluar. Bukak pintu pagar, masuk kereta, start engine, chalo! Abah aku pesan satu jek. "Dik, tolong bayar parking ticket abah tu. Semalam lopa nak bayar". Hu hu hu. Selamats.

Aku tunggu Joe dekat rendezvous point. Lama gak. Berasap sekejap telinga aku. Mamat ni selalu punctual. Hari ni pulak nak buat roti canai basi. Tapi tak apalah since dia yang akan tolong aku jadikkan plan ni. Bila joe dah sampai kitorang tukar kereta and jalan. Bermulalah plan aku. Hati aku berdebar jugak. Rasa lambat jek nak sampai. Takut ni kalau-kalau anything happen on da way. Tapi alhamdulillah kitorang sampai jugak. Terus menuju ke destinasi dalam plan yang aku karam malam semalam tuh. Okeh agenda nomo satu ngan nomo dua dah settle walaupon tak megikut kehendak aku. Agenda nomo tiga - di tengok oleh Kak Long! Kak Long kata aku dah kecut. Yehoo!

So semua dah settle. Agenda nomo empat jek lagi. Kitorang berenti kat Jalan Dot Dot Dot (macam Leez plak aku rasa kena rahsiahkan identiti lokasi) dan joe keluar kereta nak mengambil the goods in question. Aku hulur duit untuk barang tu tapi as usual Joe kata "Takper, ambik! Bumiputra Commerce dekat jek". Dia support lagi la kan. Sukanya hati jahat aku. Dah dapat barang tu. Joe masuk kereta terus jalan balik.

Hati aku tak sabar lagi dah nak bukak barang tu. Tapi joe kata sabar sebab belum tiba masanya lagi. Hari dah nak gelap dah. Joe suruh aku recce tempat sesuai nak bukak barang tu. Sebab kalau tak kena tempat tak syoklah kan? Aku berkira-kira aku rasa aku tau tempat sesuai. Aku tengok jam. Macam lagi lima belas minit tu time sesuai tu untuk bukak barang tuh. Aku suruh joe berenti tempat tu. Kitorang park cantik-cantik kat parking lot dan bergerak keluar. Barang tu aku kelok dengan berhati-hati. Taku pecah lah. Kitorang melilau carik port best. Dah jumpa pastu kitorang duduk. Isk berdebar nya hati aku. Ok ke tak ok ni? Tibai jek lah. Aku toleh orang keliling. Takder perasaan semuanya. Nak tunjuk depa poser la tu. Aku pon poser gak tapi aku ada perasaan. Perasaan lapar la. Tapi bagus jugak depa stone jek tadek la perasan apa kitorang nak buat dengan barang tu. Dah lama lepas tu aku tengok orang dah mula active. Ini signal baik nih. Aku bukak cantik-cantik dan slow-slow barang tu. Satu persatu aku keluarkan. Bila tiba masanya aku pon tibai la cukup cukup. Apa lagi Nasi Beryani Restoran Insaflah......

Perut aku memboyot. Bukan busung tapi nak pecah perut melantak nasi beryani insaf. Tobat aku tak buat lagi. Insaflah...

Of Cream and Fish

My cat Botbot's motivation in life is that bowl of Friskies seafood platter and the occasional bowl of cream or milk. You could say that his mind thinks of nothing but food and the call of nature, oh, and sleep. That is what motivates a cat, or any other animal for that matter, to stay alive. So what makes human beings motivated? Other than the want and need for a perfect well being in life there is the occasional muse or a particular person that we makes us click; the reason that we do whatever we do in life. What happens when that person no longer exists or no longer pays attention to us? Do we continue to be motivated or fall deep into the recesses of loss and depression?

On a side note: Mum's ayam percik and nasi minyak does motivate me to do all the dishes and the cleaning up, oh yes they do!

Hidden Agenda

I know some people would befriend others for their own hidden agenda. Like you get to know a person because you would like to ask for help from that person. But is there ever a time when you ask help from a person just because you would like to get to know that person better?

Guildford -> Hyde Park

We started off the day early enough. Around 5.30 a.m. Everyone got ready in a jiffy and soon we met up with Caesar and Yayan to board the train to Waterloo.

It Was the Worst of Times, It Was the Best of Times

Late Bloomer. That was what France was in tonight's match against England. For the first 90 minutes I was bored to death waiting for Henry's performance. France made a scare for the first few minutes when Zidane, Vieira and Henry made attempts to score. After that all I watched was lukewarm performance from France. Lampard woke me up in minute 38 when he scored the goal. Beckham thought he would have saved England from the penalty but he was denied the glory. I was prepared to be disgusted with France when Zidane made a free kick and scored! Right....an equaliser. And then .... David James made the mistake of being too eager to save the ball and bumped into Mr Thierry Henry. Hey presto! A penalty kick granted to the Blue-jerseyed team. Eheh. At least you contributed something to the game Mr Henry Sir! 2-1. And congrats to Miss Nagakayu for winning the bet. So call the guy already!

In the Heat of Summer Sunshine

The max temperature for today is 27 degrees. All the mat and minah sallehs are all decked out on the lawn with their skimpy attires. While they are revelling in the much sought after sunshine, we the malaysians are shying away from activities that require us to be outside. I remember working on the till one day when one makcik salleh asked me 'Why are you here?'. When I answered 'I'm here for the cool weather and the snow.', she looked at me funny. Well, to each his own right?
On another note, my friend landed herself a job at ExxonMobil and I cant help but feel envious, maybe a little jealous. Why? We were both in the same class and each pop quiz or exam became a slug fest of who could score better. Sometimes I won and at other times she did. It never really bothered me much until we came to the final year. Both of us were eligible for a VC award. When the award ceremony finally came, she was handed the 'blue ribbon' and I was not. It wasnt until later that I heard from a lecturer that her dad was buddy-buddy with the dean. I cried my heart out cuz I couldn't make my parents proud on that day since I wasn't awarded the VC. Needless to say, the award came much later in an envelope with a one line congratulation and a lame-ass apology for some 'computer system malfunction'. Dodgy? Maybe a little.

In With the New, Out With the Old



Previously, I was dying for snow. I had my camera with me all the time, ready for action when the pristine, white crystals would pour and leave my nose as red as rudolph's. I got my wish when we were in Lake District and a few weeks back in good ol' Surrey. And, now the weather is so cold that it might bring the potential of another snow fall. Heck, I felt the tiny thing lightly dribble just now when I was walking from the library to the 'Club'. But now it is no longer a novelty for me. I'm starting to long for Spring. Just the sight of those lovely flowers every time I walk to class is making my heart pray for the day when the temperature would rise above 10 degrees and I could see beautiful colors around me. Oh, well.. it's all in good time.

In The Mood for Fish



A Norwegian friend introduced me to the yummy delicacy - smoked salmon - at a house party that I recently attended and I havent been able to get over them. But the smoky after taste was too everwhelming for me so I had to improvise by lightly sauteeing the salmon and walla! I got myself a new favorite:
half a bagel
a spoonful of soft (cream) cheese
lightly sauteed smoked salmon

The Little Things In Life



Human beings have the nature of wanting it ALL. The successful career with impressive salary, the shiny car or two or three, the humongous castle on the cliffside overlooking the beautiful ocean, the gorgeous life partner, the intelligent and cute son and/or daughter, a cat or a dog, the whole works.. but sometimes it is the simple things in life that brings a smile to our mouth and makes our day. Thank you so much guys! I really appreciate them. I miss u guys like crazy.

How To Fully Utilise Your Ucuk

1. Put the smells you like (perfume/aftershave/arm pits or body odor) of your loved ones/boyfriend/girlfriend/babies/cats on your Ucuk.

2. Put your Ucuk against the heater for 5 minutes.

3. Put your Ucuk under your nose and inhale deeply.

Result? Heaven......

Ucuk: Sleepyhead does a My Elixir

You wanna meet my precious lil Ucuk




Expozing Myself: Sleepyhead does a Nagakayu

I got soooo bored last night. Got nothing to do. So I thought I'd snap a coupla pics of myself.....
You wanna see me in sexiest position?



You see my unique pose? Eheh, I usually do it by the road side but only when there's no one around.

Here is me waiting for ahkak Nagakayu or ahkak Paku to cook lunch. Just lounging under the dining table. Yup! My favorite place of all.



As a sleepyhead I CAN'T not have a blankie. Here it is... me and my blankie. We're the closest of frens, my blankie and I.



I also took a pic of me on my bed. Hee...hee..



Jangan mara aa ahkak Nagakayu, nanti kena juall!!!!!

UK 101

To those who, all their lives, have had the affinity towards valuable information or general knowledge the following facts might not be anything new. However, to me the ALLTIME HERMIT, this info is news for my coming years as being a student and a full-time slacker here in the UK.

UK - short for the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland - was formed from the merger between the Kingdom of Great Britain and the Kingdom of Ireland in 1801. Before that, the Kingdom of Great Britain was formed as a result of a merger between the kingdoms of England and Scotland. Currently, the UK consists of England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland.

England in itself is subdivided into three types of areas which are non-unitary authorities, unitary authorities and London boroughs. Since it might take the whole of 2004 for yours truly to explain, you might wanna read about them here.
There, that explains why I always have a headache when I try to associate a particular name of place with its physical location. Mind boggling! You never know whether it's a borough, a county, or a state.

UK's current Prime Minister is Tony Blair, although it might change anytime soon judging from several major events taking place this week. Amongst them are UK's bid for the 2012 Olympics, the report about the murder of Dr Robert Kelly and the military kit shortages problem. At least the Defense Secretary, Geoff Hoon, is definitely under fire since the exposure of serious military equipment shortages by a widow of a military officer who died because he had to give up his body armour as there were not enough to go around.

UK's favorite words, in my books, are KNACKERED, SHATTERED and GUTTED (pronounced in intense, guttural sound). Why do they like to use these words? Beats me! I think they only sound sexy when they are being uttered by cute 'Shattered' contestant Chris. Otherwise, they sound completely British (read: offputting).

Finally, this has got to be UK's ugliest car. No, wait! It's UK's second ugliest car. Put that in yellow and hey, presto! you got yourself UK's BUTT (pardon the rude language) UGLIEST car. Apart from the unimaginative name of 'Ka', its bodystyle has got to be the most uncreative design I've ever seen. What was the designer thinking??!!

On another note, I got this hilarious link from a friend.

My First Book Review

Someone (Thank you, you!) suggested that I write a review about a book I read. I was pretty reluctant at first seeing how rusty my English is lately. But somehow I tried to muster up the courage to do it and guess what?! It's published! It might not sound as 'book review'-ish as I might like but hey, at least I tried. You can read it here.

Dress My Neck


The winter season in Surrey is not that harsh. You can sometimes still walk around without putting on your long johns. A sweater and a coat would suffice. HOWEVER, that fact does not suppress my obsession for the above scarf and glove set. Eheh, hey! It's nothing fancy. Just a normal winter wear you see every Jane or Jennifer or Julie or even the occasional Nan-Li or Oshin wearing. But, you don't normally see a Aminah, Fatimah or Zaharah wearing them. Since I'll only be experiencing winter once in the next, oh maybe 4 years, I have consoled myself that it's not really an item on the top of my NEED list. However, how do you differ between what you NEED and what you WANT when the WANT just obsessively materialises in your dreams and in your mind when you eat or take a shower that you freakishly hallucinate every hour and think that it definitely IS what you NEED? Ok, so it can't be worn in the summer or the spring or maybe fall, ok so I dont really need the scarf, just the gloves, but it SO matches my ADIDAS sling bag. How can you top that as a reason to buy it??? Eheh.

Tripping 1: To Beetle or Not To Beetle

I have been putting off writing about my recent trip to the middle earth, eh!, part, of the British Isles mainly because it would be redundant since all my friends have written about it in their blogs. You can read about them here, here and here. Having said that, it seems the urge to write about it is still there. Heh. So here goes. It might not be as exciting a description as my friends' but what the heck!
Of course, the trip wouldn't have happened without a ride and well hey there! here comes the ride. It was a Volkswagen Beetle....NOT! Heh, well it only LOOKED like the Beetle. This distant cousin of hers is called Nissan Micra 1.2. A small, compact but very well-built car. It managed to house a whole lot of duvets under its teeny weeny boot. The duvets were the result of a lack of sleepingbags. Hey, how were we supposed to know that sleepingbags would come in handy??!We've only been here a coupla months.
Anyways, we got our ride from Enterprise Rent-a-Car. Word got around that it's one of the cheapest rental agency around town. It was either that or Kendall. Anyways, having experienced the process of renting a car, I find a few lessons to be learnt. Heh, leave it to me to be the 'skema', sensible type to come up with lessons to be learnt.
1. Always ask or HAGGLE your way to a deal that suits you most. Don't be shy or afraid to negotiate. The people at the agency are usually friendly enough to entertain your haggling.
2. You have to ask the minute details of the insurance coverage for the car if you are not already told about it. You might think that you got a cheap price for a car only to find out an accident or so later that you have to foot the bill yourself.
3. Do not leave the agency without inspecting the car for dents or damages. Failure to do so might result in you being held responsible for the crime you didn't commit when you return the car.
4. Last but not least, jangan gila stereng! Hehe. Do ask the reps first about every nook and cranny of the car, which buttons to push, which buttons NOT to push, yadda, yadda, yadda before you go on taking a joy ride. Otherwise, you might end up opening the hood when you want to fill up the tank. AhkakNaga sure paham kan? Eheh *wink* *wink*.
Needless to say, the Micra purred like a cream-filled kitten when we took it under our wings, or is it the other way around?!.Anyways, it was a breeze to drive except for the 30-million enjin mampos. Kih Kih.



VW Beetle's little sister

The Life of Pi


I've been spending the remnants of my holiday reading this marvellous book by Yann Martel. Actually, I started reading it during my exam week. Drat, that devil who seduced me into reading it eventhough I had vowed to myself that it would be read ONLY and ONLY IF I finished my exams. Needless to say, I couldnt put it down! I had to stash it under my bed to prevent myself from being a sleeplessinsurrey. Anyways, the verdict? I consider it one of the best books that I've read so far. However, I was a bit saddened by the ending. But, like Pi was thinking, people would prefer to hear the happy version of things in life.