while I was somewhat wallowing in self-pity that I would have the chance to do it too, come this May. And hell, I'm not gonna miss the chance! I am gonna get back on track with myself. And then try to console myself with a trip to New Zealand, yehoo! Cross my fingers and hope everything comes to a nice, yummy end.
Posted in: on March 27, 2007 at at 5:47:00 PM 0 comments
across a few major setbacks in our current endeavor. It's got me thinking about whether we made the right decision. Nevertheless, we still have a few more options we'd like to explore and take it from there. If this blows, I think I would leave it to fate and let God Almighty guide us through the next chapter.
Meanwhile, there is a frenzy over here concerning get rich quick schemes. I'm not sure of it but I hear a lot of people have been getting rich.
Someone from my workplace has obviously found this blog and I'm not sure who it is. I guess I better put a leash on topics concerning work. Maybe I'll stick with the mundane things happening in my life like grocery and shoe shopping.
It's good to know I have some eggs.
Posted in: on at at 12:51:00 PM 0 comments
Toxic reminds me of summer back in Guildford. Lush greens and moderate temperature. Thesis writing and staying up with loads of coffee and a bar of cadbury's or two. The common room at night. The town center in the morning for work. Summer sale. Summer blockbusters. Cheese and onion pasty from Gregg's after work. The scorching heat during my noon walk back to Stag Hill. Late night isya' prayers when the sun is still up. It's not the song itself, but do you know the feeling when certain songs or smells or sights bring back memories?
I'd like to think that it's very flattering when my students try to imitate me during their class presentation. At least they paid attention. All the nuances, hints and expressions. How I ask questions to put forward a point. How I to gain the attention of a sleepy student by pointing him/her out to class. I witnessed this today among some of my students. They may be mocking me. I don't know. But, I can't help feeling just a little bit satisfied. I made an impression, at least.
Posted in: on March 21, 2007 at at 4:32:00 PM 0 comments
world has always been a mystery to me. But Kak Long seems to have taken it as her pillar of strength. Her sons not doing well in school? Somebody must hold a grudge at her. Must see the bomoh. Things not going smooth at the office? Her officemate(s) must be in a state of envy of her. Must see the ustaz.
We followed her to see one last night. From my observations, the ustaz was not telling her anything that we didn't already know. I surmise that he is only playing mind games with Kak Long. He sees what Kak Long is worried about and he just enhances her worries. I say, Get a grip, Kak Long! Learn to deal with the problem first. Then ask the graces of Allah for help. Then, maybe, when all else fails, go see the ustaz. We had the cheek to ask Kak Long where the ustaz graduated from and for a moment I could see her stutter.
* Nasi Goreng Special Zuno at the ustaz's premises was great, though. Succulent meat cooked in black pepper sauce served with butter rice and egg sunny side up. Our only regret was that the servings were meagre.
Posted in: on at at 11:36:00 AM 0 comments
hate myself to death. I can't even stand to look at myself in the mirror. Hate the sight of me, of who I've become. What made me this horrible, timid, cowardly person. And this feeling usually comes when I admit defeat. Defeat to something that to some might be such an insignificant issue that makes me feel even smaller. Like yesterday. But only for a moment. Today I woke up with a new strength. Knowing the fact that life will go on and I just have to keep fighting and striving to reach my goals. Of this and that. Of gaining just a bit more wisdom that last time. Of getting this...
Posted in: on March 20, 2007 at at 8:16:00 AM 0 comments
a long, long entry about things including Pak Lah and Lim Keng Yaik and the pool and my aching body. But given the wire-less state of our network it's now gone. Ah, well ~later.
I feel like killing those psycophants but I'm afraid of the state of Malaysia's prison. So, I'll probably just go kill the blackheads on my forehead.
I miss my mom. And I need money from her. Ingrate daughter that I am.
I need energy to fight them. I'll go live in a cage for the weekend.
Posted in: on March 16, 2007 at at 5:29:00 PM 0 comments
lucky before, at winning things. I've never won any prizes from a lucky draw, never won any competition that I entered, never received freebies from anywhere. Imagine my surprise when while I was doing such a mundane thing as grocery shopping a siren suddenly went off. I stared inquisitively at the cashier girl and she smiled suspiciously. Then, a couple of workers from the hypermarket approached me and said that, drumroll please! I won something. Eheh. Not something grand. Just some shopping vouchers. Now I have next month's grocery bill taken care of. If you do recognize me lookout for our photos at the hypermarket.
*Kak Ida's birthday was yesterday. Happy Birthday Kakak! Age is but a number, yo!
*It's been a great few days Kak Zai. See, it's not you that I hate. It's them. And next time DO let me choose the movies. I have much better taste, ahem.
*We spent the weekend at an inn in Segamat making babies. Let's see if those pills will do anything.
*Condolences to Anis & Ali. May he/she rest in peace.
Posted in: on March 13, 2007 at at 11:51:00 AM 0 comments
was not at the Canseleri. Rather it was nasi campur at Kedai Kopi Abah. An 180 degree turn, you ask? I had an ersatz lunch date with Ayu and Yati. But before that was a trip to, drumroll please...., the doctor's. Doc Suzet to be exact. I had the Doc prescribe me some folic acid pills. To prepare for the, erm, pregnancy. And I have an appointment with her next month to see how I'm doing.
Posted in: on March 08, 2007 at at 2:50:00 PM 0 comments
cranky from all the keyboard tapping. So are my arms. This desk needs a bit of sawing if it was up to me. Ergonomics my a#%. The designer woke up on the wrong side of the bed and cracked his head, I reckon. My friends including the Roomie have ostensibly vanished from the face of this earth today leaving me alone tending to my bored self. Seems fair, though. I abandoned them since the day he came back for almost a good week. Asked him out to play truant and go to a movie but he couldn't decide which movie to watch. Damn indecisive bloke! If it was s%x that I was asking for I'm sure he'd be a tad resolute. Sha is now in the last 40 days of her pregnancy and is only just now realizing that she is pregnant. So she is pretending to have morning sickness and is refusing to go to work. That's another potential lunch buddy out the window. Am getting these regular visions of the Canseleri's Cajun Chicken and creme caramel but due to lack of a lunch buddy guess I'm gonna have to forgo the desire to splurge some hard earned cash on the fat inducing fare. They're really good though, so if anyone's interested in spending RM7.90 only for a lunch set today, buzz!
*** No of pages done -- 8
*** No of pages to do -- 3256000000 trillion
Posted in: on at at 11:48:00 AM 0 comments
to keep a straight face while typing when my roomate is in. See, she's the sort of person who is a bit staitlaced. Stuffy. While others would be pretending to do important stuff while trying to hide the YM window, she would do the opposite when people pass by her desk. Turn that browser with important infos and facts or work off and turn on the YM window and stare at it without any typing. And she gets kinda tetchy when people ask her what she's doing. She's trying to get ahead of us, the newbies. She's a newbie as well but she aligns herself with oldies to get ahead. And she's not afraid to show that she means business. The fecking annoying thing is that it's working. People, well important people that is, are starting to notice her. And being a mouse that I am, it's beginning to gnaw on me. Get on my nerves. Because like some people, I do my work well if I do say so myself. But I just don't brag about it. Unlike her. But there are certain perks of being her roomate. I get to hear the latest gossips first. Because, she is nosy as she is a hardworker. Plus, I hear the latest tips and tricks of getting ahead. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, they say. I'm putting on a tight leash on this one. To think that we'd be neighbours in the near future!
Posted in: on March 07, 2007 at at 10:07:00 AM 0 comments
how I feel about pregnancy. It didn't become a big issue when we were newlyweds. We didn't practice any form of contraception. If a baby comes, it comes. That was our stand. THEN. Now, after close to two years of wedded bliss, though, I'm not so sure. The MOM and the DAD are asking. The MOM IN LAW, er, still keeping mum. At least that's one side of the pressure off. Frankly, I am not that bothered about the MOM and the DAD. They have loads on their hands as it is, with 6 grandkids at last count. It is my own feelings about the issue that I'm worrying about. Cuz, I don't think I have a strong stand on any side. On the one hand, seeing Anita frequent the WC for hourly vomitting is very endearing to me. Not the idea of vomitting (God! No!) but the idea that she is experiencing pregnancy at such an early stage of her marriage. She and Ali have only been married for 2 months. On the other hand, I think I'm still enjoying my independence. Not that I would be less independent if I had a baby. Far from it, the baby would be dependent on me methinks. But I have less of a burden right now. I'm still playing catch up with my career. And we still have the house to think about. So a baby anytime soon isn't exactly a solution to anything. And I'm not quite sure if he would be a great dad. Oh, he's charming with kids now. That I know. He only needs to look at kids and they would be smitten within a second. Ask my nieces and nephews. But how would he be with his own kids? But isn't it a wonderful feeling to hold a baby in your arms? To smell that fuzzy head full of baby talcum? To pinch those chubby cheeks, and arms, and thighs? There IS a reason why people call them bundles of joy, afterall!
Posted in: on March 06, 2007 at at 10:39:00 AM 0 comments
involved chocolate. Not necessarily to satisfy my sweet tooth.
AJ turned 1 on Saturday. And the boy didn't even wake up to celebrate it at dinnertime.
Posted in: on March 05, 2007 at at 2:55:00 PM 0 comments
